Expansion Joints

WOW!

2008-12-07T07:40:00.004-05:00

We are alive.
We are moved.
We are (hopefully) all better ...

Just a little recap of the last week:
Last Sunday, we got up and packed our suitcases to leave Nashville. We had a great Thanksgiving weekend with the Fenders. Took the boys to the zoo, strolled around downtown, went to the Rhyman, and ate lots of food. We rolled out of Nashville around 10:00 am CST, and got home around 6:00 pm. The biggest excitement on the way home was in Chattanooga. We got really backed up in traffic. When we finally started moving (in the right lane), we saw that the left lane was backed up due to a super slow driver. When we started driving past, we noticed that the driver was slumped over! Luckily we were on a straight area in the mountains, so he didn't run off the road. Christian pulled over, jumped out of the car, and started banging on the guy's window. I called 911. The guy - who was older- woke up and raced off. Hopefully, he just fell asleep and didn't have any condition that caused him to fall asleep again.

Monday morning I got up bright and early to be at the testing center by 7:30 am. I took my test and went home to finish packing. I don't want to jinx myself, but the test wasn't intimidating. We'll see in 1-3 weeks. That afternoon, Christian's mom came up from Florida.

Tuesday morning we were up early to meet the packers. They came around 9:30 to pack the beds and a wall hanging. I was expecting the actual movers "mid-day". They show up around 2:45 (that is not mid-day to me). I pack our cars with the odds and ends I don't want on the truck, and they pack the truck. By 7:30 we roll out of North Augusta. Christian was in Statesboro all day for meetings. I am so glad Carol was there to help with Lukas. I barely made it as it was. I'm not sure what I would have done if she wasn't there.

Wednesday morning we are woken up at 5 by Lukas throwing up. Christian meets the movers at the house at 8 while we are getting ready, dealing with a sick baby and trying to have breakfast at the hotel. We get to the house around 9:30, and Lukas continues to throw up until around 11. After that he sleeps most of the day.

Thursday Lukas seems much better, and we all set to the task of unpacking the boxes.

Friday Carol leaves and Christian goes to work. Lukas sleeps most of the morning. That afternoon, I start to feel sick. I call Christian to come home, and he is starting to feel sick, too. We make it to bedtime, and all go to bed early. I wake up in the middle of the night and throw up. By morning, Christian and I are feeling a little better, and after some breakfast and coffee we feel well enough to drive up to North Augusta and get the rest of our things and clean the house.

We went over to a new neighbor's for dinner last night. It was great to get out, meet new people, and feel well. We were actually able to walk to their house (it's a few blocks away). Now that we are back in the land of the living, I am really excited about what this move is going to bring.

I have most of our stuff unpacked and in it's place. Today is laundry and starting to get the office in order. By next week, Lukas and I will be out running errands and Christian will be diving head first into his new job. It's going to be busy, but this is going to be a great home.

Quick Notes:

2008-11-19T14:13:00.003-05:00

Using pre-divided liquor and wine boxes to pack glasses and stemware: BRILLIANT!
Scheduling a test and a move one and two days after a Thanksgiving holiday in which one will be out of town: IDIOTIC!
Trying to pack a house with a 17 month old: YET TO BE FULLY DETERMINED!

Needless to say, my stress level is through the roof. I am having to literally remind myself to breathe today. So far, I have packed 6 boxes (which equals half the contents of the china cabinet). Hopefully, the results will pick up here in the next day or so.

I also learned that washable markers (emphasis on the washable) and a note pad will keep a 17 month old occupied for about an hour.

Oh, and we went to my 12 week check up and everything is going well. I have my next sonogram on January 7th, so we'll find out if it is a boy or girl then. With everything else that is going on, I sometimes forget that we have a little one on the way.

Wish me luck (or better yet - COME HELP ME!!!)

2008-11-12T07:55:00.005-05:00

I am a minority.

Besides the fact that I am female, it seems not being affiliated with a religion AND being liberal in my political and social views makes me very strange. (but, I've been told I am loved anyway - nice to know).

The hate that I have seen (luckily in the media, and not first hand) during this past election saddens me. The thing that I find VERY ironic is all that hate seems to be coming from the Christian right. Does that make sense? Aren't those who are religious, those who are supposed to be followers of God, aren't they supposed to be the ones who are preaching (and living) a life of love toward fellow man? They aren't.

After the election, and all of the coverage of the hatemongers (Republicans/ Christians), I started really thinking about where I stand. I felt I needed to vent in a public forum, and not just to my husband.

Politically: I align myself with the Democratic party. In general, that party places importance and has the same views on the issues I find important. I need not go into issue by issue details, it's just the fact. I will also (probably) always align myself with the Democratic nominee for President. Initially, I did not jump on the Obama bandwagon. However, I have found it very exciting that he has been elected. Historically, his election is extremely significant, and I am proud to have been a part of such an important event. I am also relieved that Palin did not worm her way into the White House. That woman frightens me, and to think that the American people almost elected such a nut would have surely sent me to Canada. Luckily, intelligence prevailed. Whew!

Religiously: I think all organized religion is a crock. Yep, I said it. However, I do not judge those who belong to this church or that. It is their reality. It is what they believe. It is what they need in their lives. Great. I don't, so don't judge me. Just because you go to church every week, you read the bible, you pray, you do all of your other rituals, does that mean you are better than me? Are you giving freely of yourselves to fellow humanity? Are you protecting the earth that your God gave you? Are you practicing love? Too often, I am not seeing that. You cannot tell me that just because I do not go to church and do not believe in your God that I am damned. It is not your place to judge me (per your own rules). I do not claim that I know the correct answers, but it doesn't matter to me. My goal for this life is to come to its end, look back, and know that I was the best human I could be. That I protected the earth the best I could. That I raised children who were tolerant, non-judgemental and loving in every sense of the word. That I gave of myself to my fellow man without expectations of something in return - that I did it because it was the right thing to do. If I cannot see that I have lived my life selflessly and with love, then maybe I am damned. But, I cannot believe, that if there is a God, he will damn me just because I did not go to a church.

I am tired.
Tired of all the hate that is in this world.
Tired of the judgement.
Tired of the hypocrisy.

At least with the elected President, I have had a renewed feeling of hope. He may not be able to bring about the change that is needed, but it's a beginning. It makes me hopeful of my future and my children's future. It makes me remember that, although I am just one, I can contribute to the bigger cause and make a difference.

Perseverance.

On The Road Again

2008-11-03T15:29:00.002-05:00

As of the first week in December, we will be leaving North Augusta and moving to Statesboro, GA. Christian has been offered, and accepted, the position of Planning Director for the City of Statesboro. We are very excited about the move and the opportunities the community has to offer. This will also put us in a more central location between immediate families.

We have our house on the market, and are hoping to sell it. However, if by mid-November, we haven't had any offers, we will rent it out. We have a house lined up in Statesboro to rent.

I am frantically studying for my last Architectural Registration Exam. I passed General Structures, and will be taking Lateral Forces the weekend before Thanksgiving. If I can get enough consistent study time, I think it will go well. With the upcoming move and with upcoming travel, that looks sketchy.

Lukas is doing great. He is really starting to "chat", and has expanded his sounds a lot in the last week. He is all about asking questions: hand motions and change of voice inflection. He is a stubborn little thing, and I am constantly after him to stay out of the drawers and cabinets we have set off limits. He now gets popped on the leg because the hand became ineffective. The leg seems to get the message across a little better.

What? Who?

2008-08-06T15:08:00.004-05:00

So, this blogger thing is no go of late. Who has time? Although, evidently I do have a bit of time now ... we'll see how long this lasts.

Lukas is 13-1/2 months old. He is walking, "jumping", and getting into everything. He is very much boy - you can always find him with a stick in his hand. He has different noises for each of his cars, trucks and boats. Of course, everything seems to have a motor now. He loves books, bikes, balloons, and animals. He is getting pretty good at his animal noises - tiger and snake were the first. He really isn't "speaking", but I noticed a couple of days ago he is changing the inflection in his voice. Really interesting. He also spanks himself when he does something he knows he shouldn't. He knows - it just doesn't stop him.

We are having a bit of an issue with nighttime sleeping. He stopped nursing last Thursday (sniff, sniff - it was harder than I thought - for me), but putting him to bed has gone pretty well. He wakes up two or three times a night. I usually go in, check on him, and rock him for a couple of minutes, then back in his crib. Sometimes it goes well, others he does not want to go back to his crib. I am wondering if he relies on me checking on him ... hard to know what to do. Otherwise, no problems. He takes two good naps a day. Eats very well. Is extremely good natured.

I have been studying non-stop for the past couple of months. I took my *hopefully* next to last exam for Architectural Registration 1-1/2 weeks ago. I'll take the *last* one in another month or so. I will be so glad to get this out of the way. I should find out my results in 1-3 weeks.

Otherwise, we are just trying to stay cool, and keep some money in the bank. Groceries have gone over the top with prices. I am buying 90% fresh food (dairy, meat, veggies and fruit) and it is still $200/ week. Ridiculous! I tried planting a couple of square foot gardens, but it's not going so well. I think I waited to late to plant, and I didn't add lime to the tomatoes and peppers. Oh well, second planting is a couple of months away.

11 days until Desiree is married. It's hard to believe both of my little sisters will be married and starting on the wonderful life journey of families of their own. It is pretty exciting, and has been cause for much reflection over Christian and my last 10 years together (yep, September 5th with be big 1-0). I just feel more and more blessed each year.

Where Did The Time Go?

2008-04-03T10:45:00.003-05:00

Have you ever watched kids on a merry-go-round?

Or listened to the rain slapping on the ground?

Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight?

Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?

You better slow down.

Don't dance so fast.

Time is short.

The music won't last.

Do you run through each day on the fly?

When you ask how are you?

Do you hear the reply?

When the day is done do you lie in your bedwith the next hundred chores running through your head?

You'd better slow down.

Don't dance so fast.

Time is short.

The music won't last.

Ever told your child, we'll do it tomorrow?

And in your haste, not see his sorrow?

Ever lost touch, let a good friendship die cause you never had time to call and say "Hi".

You'd better slow down.

Don't dance so fast.

Time is short.

The music won't last.

When you run so fast to get somewhere you miss half the fun of getting there.

When you worry and hurry through your day, it is like an unopened gift thrown away.

Life is not a race.

Do take it slower.

Hear the music before the song is over.

I posted the poem above about this time last year. It is amazing how quickly time has flown. Lukas is now 9 1/2 months and is amazing! I am so blessed to be able to stay at home with him full time. Each day is filled with laughter and wonderment. I stress that I am doing enough with him or doing too much. I am trying to soak in every minute of every day, because they are going by so quickly. He is crawling everywhere, pulling up, and pushing and walking behind anything that moves. He is very content to sit a play with his toys or play outside or sit and listen to me read and sing to him. Since having him, the world has been filtered down to the basics: eating, sleeping, cleaning (him, me, the house), music, laughter, love. None of the material things really matter any more. For one, we can't afford "extras", and I really don't miss it. This is the life that I have been searching for for a long time, and I am full of peace now that I have it. All I need is a smile or kiss from my little boy, and life is perfect.

Arrggghhh

2007-12-21T15:32:00.000-05:00

So, my old template disappeared, and when I went to change the settings, all of my links disappeared. So, anyone know how to get all of my links back? If not, please send me your blog information to link to my blog.

Otherwise, I am going to be a stay-at-home mom in February. YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We're Back

2007-08-31T14:05:00.000-05:00

We are back from our cross-half-country trip with our two month old son. Brave, you may say. Or completely insane. Either way, we have lived to tell about it.

I won't spend a lot of time going into specifics, but here was our basic trip:

Monday, left South Carolina and drove to Richmond, Virginia. 6 hour trip took 8 hours. Not bad. Tuesday, left Virginia and drove to Lancaster, Pennsylvania. Stayed with Christian's aunts and uncles in Lancaster and York, PA. Left PA Saturday morning. Drove two days to Springfield. Stayed with Dan and Jeannie for a couple of days (ate very well), and then stayed with the Fenders the remainder of the week (ate well again). We left Saturday morning and made it back to SC by Sunday afternoon.

It was great to visit family, and we were even able to introduce Lukas to his Great Grandmother Stoeckle. Pennsylvania is beautiful. I had only been up there in the winter before. Summer time is great. They grow the best sweet corn I have ever tasted. We also invested in an Amish handmade quilt. Christian's aunt had a quilter she had used, so we didn't end up in one of the tourist shops. It is really cool.

Springfield was a whirlwind. We had so many people to see, but it didn't seem like we spent enough time with anyone. To top it all off, Christian was (and still is) sick. That put a damper on things. We did get to drop in on our old neighborhood's annual block party. Boy were people surprised to see us. We also went on a tour of a new chocolate factory in Springfield. This lawyer started it himself. He contracts directly with the farmers and they grow and harvest the beans to his specifications. He then processes the beans and makes the chocolate. It is very good. Almost like a cooking chocolate, so if you are a milk chocolate fan, it may not be for you.

Since we've been back, I've just been enjoying every minute I have with Lukas. We went in for his two month checkup and he is up to 15 pounds 4 ounces and 23 inches long. Big boy. Anyway, I start back to work next week. I am doing half days for the first week, then I'll go back Tuesday-Friday. Let me tell you, I do not want to. I am against sending him to daycare with every inch of my being. Unfortunately, the numbers are not adding up for me to be able to quit. We are going to try me going back for a couple of months and see how much we can get paid off (student loan, car). Maybe by the end of the year, I'll be able to stay home with him. Does anyone have $15,000 laying around that they would like to contribute to the "Keep Lukas Home Fund"? Ha Ha.

Well, it sounds like Lukas has had enough of Christian, so I better see if I can help.

Shhhh! The Beast Is Sleeping!

2007-07-17T16:25:00.000-05:00

I went for my six week check up today.

The fastest weight loss system is having a baby.

Pre-pregnancy weight: 112
Full-term pregnancy weight: 154 (yes, I gained 42 pounds)
Current weight: 124 - 12 pounds to go! Now to find the time to tone up those abs.

I have to say parenthood is challenging, tiring, and completely worth all of the hard times. Lukas is doing well, and is giving us more and more quality awake time each day. He has started smiling at us, and loves it when I kiss his cheeks and belly. He looks at the toys hanging overhead, and has started hitting at the ones in his bouncy seat. I think he is going to be a lefty like his dad. This week he started sleeping all night. The first night he slept from 7 pm until about 3:30 am. I had had half a beer at dinner, so I was afraid I had gotten him drunk. After he slept full nights the next two nights, I figured it wasn't the alcohol after all. It was kind of scary at first, but now that I realize they do that, I can enjoy a full nights sleep with out worrying about why he isn't waking up at 2 am.

Other than hanging out with Lukas all day long, no, that is pretty much all I do. I have been able to let go of the housework. As long as I can get up, get showered, dressed and make-up on each morning, make the bed and do laundry, I feel like I've accomplished something. As Lukas is getting older, I am able to put him down more. Allowing me to do things like updating my blog.

We are having guests this weekend, and we'll go up to Walhalla in a couple of weeks. It will be our first long trip, and we'll get to introduce Lukas to my aunts and uncles. In August, we are planning a two week road trip to Pennsylvania and out to Missouri. I am really looking forward to seeing everyone, but the thought of being out of our element is a little stressful. The good thing is everyone we are visiting has had kids, so they will all understand what we are going through.

I head back to work September 11. I am doing the first week half days, and will go back to 8 hour days the following week. I will only be working four days a week, but I dread leaving Lukas. I was separated from him for 2 hours today, and was so happy to get him back in my arms when I got home. If nothing else, having him in daycare will help me appreciate him that much more on the days I get to stay with him.

I think that is about all that is going on here. As all parents know, babies are full time jobs, but it is the best job in the world. I am so glad we were blessed with Lukas!

Ewwww!

2007-06-19T13:15:00.001-05:00

FIRST IMPRESSION OF THE WORLD

Lukas Friedrich Lentz was born at 12:07 pm, Friday, June 15, 2007. He was 9 pounds even and 21 inches long. We had some minor complications in labor earlier that morning. After the doctor broke my water, Lukas' heart rate dropped. The doctor was able to stabilize him, but we decided to go ahead and have a c-section. There was no need for me to risk further stress on him just to have a natural birth. We experienced every emotion possible in that 24 hour time period. It was the most amazing thing to hear his first cry and to know that little thing that had been inside of me was a real little boy. He is really great. We are slowly figuring each other out and we are all three getting into a schedule. I'm feeling pretty good, but obviously sore from the c-section. Christian has been doing a great job of taking care of stuff around the house, and taking care of me. I have only had one period that was overwhelming. Overall, I am just taking things as they come and making the adjustments I need to. I feel pretty confident about being able to do this, and just love looking at this little thing Christian and I made.

CAR RIDE HOME

The End (or Beginning) Is Near

2007-06-13T07:41:00.000-05:00

After much thought and discussion with my doctor, and another sonogram, we decided to induce. I will check into the hospital Thursday evening and be induced Friday. Hopefully, all will go quickly and we'll have a baby boy later that day. (Dad, sorry he is a week too late to preempt your sermonette).

Get Out Of My Belly!!!

2007-06-08T08:21:00.001-05:00

I am done with this pregnancy thing. No more trying to look on the bright side and enjoy it. I am miserable.

I decided that I am too tired and too preoccupied to continue working, so I went in to the office and discussed it with my boss. By 1:00 everything was wrapped up, and I was officially "off the clock". I understand now why everyone kept questioning my decision to work up until I go into labor. There is just no point. This way, I can rest when needed - which is more often than not since I really don't sleep during normal sleeping hours - and get some household chores done.

I did seem to have burst of energy Tuesday. By 8:30 am, I was taping off our hallway. By 10:00 am, it was being painted Mali Orange.

It adds a nice punch of color to the house. In the evening, the sun hits it just right, and it glows. I am pretty happy with the results. Of course, I was obviously a little tired by the end, and we'll need to put a second coat on this weekend, but at least it is one project done. Christian was pretty surprised, but pleased when he got home that evening. I guess that is what is called nesting? I call it crazy.

I am four days away from my due date, and this kid is not budging. Time for long walks and cod liver oil.

We're Still Here

2007-06-04T09:51:00.000-05:00

Well, I found out last week that I had my due date wrong this whole time. I am actually due June 12th, not the 15th. Now, I realize that number doesn't really mean too much, but it's still a little disconcerting. Anyway, now we are focused on next Tuesday. I wish it were that accurate. For the most part, I have had a pretty good pregnancy. Sure, I've had heartburn, indigestion, trouble sleeping, achy joints, exhaustion, but it's been good. All of that doesn't matter when I look at the ultrasound picture or feel him moving. It is truly amazing to know what I have been nurturing and growing for the past nine months. I wouldn't trade it for the world.

Let's see, what else has happened in the last two months ...

My sister's threw me a great baby shower! Christian helped a few of our friends from Missouri come out and surprise me, and his uncle and aunt-to-be came down from Pennsylvania. It was great to have all of the family and friends there. In all of the negativity that is going on in today's world, being able to look around a room filled with friends and family is very encouraging. I know that, no matter what the condition of the world, our son will be surrounded by love and positive energy.

Christian and I have finished the nursery, including putting all the gifts and clothes up. He also finished the screened porch and has now moved on to the front yard.

Our house is surrounded by azaleas. They are literally everywhere. The old lady was a little obsessed. Anyway, a few weeks ago, after the blooms had died, we started pruning them. We got the sides and back in pretty good shape, but the front azaleas were so large that when we pruned them, half of them were dead growth. I fought to keep them, thinking they will come back next season, and we can work with them. We also had two islands of azaleas hiding tree stumps in the front yard. They were smaller plants, and we thought the scale would go better in front of the house than what was there. So, we decided to pull up all of the azaleas in the front of the house, move the smaller ones to replace them, and have the stumps ground out so we can work on grass and other plantings in those areas. Long story short, all of the azaleas in front of our house are gone. We now have patchy grass and three huge oak trees. We are just going to start fresh. It actually looks better. Sad. So, that is our next house project. Of course, I am picking out $200 plants, so it may take a while to get it started, but for the rest of the summer, we'll be prepping the yard (as well as raising a baby). I warned Christian that the two weeks he is taking off after Lukas is born will not be spent doing yard work. I wouldn't put it past him.

I am still working full time, and plan to up until I go into labor. I did take today off to get a little more rest. I think I woke up every two hours last night, and could not go back to sleep. I do not believe that this is preparing me for the late night/ early morning feedings that I can look forward to. I think this is leaving me sleep deprived.

Otherwise, we are waiting. Didn't Tom Petty say waiting is the hardest part? It's true. I know time will run it's course, and I should enjoy the pregnancy, but we are days away from the most amazing thing we have ever experienced. I am anxious about the whole childbirth thing, and am ready to get that behind me, and I am also ready to meet this little guy and introduce him to the world.

Nine More WEEKS (not months)

2007-04-13T08:13:00.000-05:00

Well, I hit the 31 week mark. A little over two months until the arrival of our little bundle of joy. We are almost finished the two projects. I think we will be able to wrap them up this weekend. Maybe I'll be able to post some pics of the finished products next week.

The side porch has been screened in. All Christian has to do is paint the ceiling blue and put in a new ceiling fan. It's a nice little space. It is on the North side of the house, so it should be nice and cool in the summer.

The nursery walls are done, the rug is down, and all the furniture (except the crib) is in place. My mother-in-law, sister-in-law, and aunt-in-law are coming in this weekend to sew the roman shades for the windows. Getting the right fabric has been quite an ordeal. I went to Hancock Fabric in Augusta a few weeks ago, and found a striped fabric that has a perfect match to the blue and green we painted the walls. I mean PERFECT match. I got the pattern in the mail a couple of weeks ago, and went back to purchase said fabric. I needed 7 1/2 yards to make 4 shades. They had 4 yards. I frantically called my sister-in-law to see if they had a Hancock in Jacksonville. They don't, but she got online and found an online store that had the entire 7 1/2 yards. I went ahead and bought the 4 yards, and ordered the 7 1/2 when I got home (figuring I would return what I had). I got an email Wednesday saying they were out of stock and that product was discontinued. PANIC. I quickly went to Hancock online, and ordered the remaining 4 yards I needed, hoping the dye lots would be the same, and the fabric would match. I got an email yesterday saying they were out of stock!!! PANIC, PANIC. I went online, and found the closest Hancock is in Columbia, SC. One hour away, so it's drivable. I call, and they have it in stock, and have enough. So, I was planning on driving to Columbia first thing Saturday morning to get this fabric so the in-laws could sew with it Saturday afternoon. I don't even know this kid yet, and I am willing to drive all over the place to make sure his room is perfect????? Anyway, Christian volunteered to pick up the fabric, so it seems all is well.

The next few weekends will be spent going to the Tour of Georgia, Beaufort, SC and a baby shower. After that, we are done until Lukas comes. I figure we will need to store up our rest as much as possible. He is continuing to grow, which means I am continuing to grow. I've gained 32 pounds so far. I will exceed 150 by the time it's all over. Hilarious! It's kind of weird watching these lumps move across my belly. I think I am able to discern between head and feet. Crazy. For the most part, I am enjoying this pregnancy thing. Sure, there are days that are really uncomfortable, and I haven't had a good nights sleep in a while, but when I think about what I am sacrificing for, it's all good. I really can't wait to meet this little guy.

2007-03-22T15:36:00.000-05:00

Happy Birthday Summer and Christian!!!!!

2007-03-04T15:54:00.000-05:00

I looked down at my feet yesterday and discovered my ankles are gone. I know they were there a few days ago. But at least I can still see my feet.

Real Post

2007-03-01T12:36:00.000-05:00

So, what is happening in the Lentz household these days?

A lot.

Pre-baby Lukas is continuing to grow and kick. Great for Lukas, bad for mom. At my last doctor's appointment, I learned I had packed on an additional 8 pounds last month. That put me over the 130 mark. I still have 17 weeks to go. At a pound a week ... that is close to 150. Those are crazy numbers. Crazy I say! Hopefully, the ridiculously fast Burdette metabolism will kick in again, and the pounds will fall off after birth. If not, I may have to resort to .... exercise! Noooooooo! Actually, we live a couple of blocks from the North Augusta Greenway trail, so I see a lot of strolls with my boy in the future. Especially if I get a cool jogging stroller.

Otherwise, it is 8 hours of architecture a day, followed up with couch time or house projects. It depends on whether or not Christian is working late. So far, he has cleaned the brick tile on our side porch floor (the old lady put down AstroTurf with superglue, so that took a while - kidding, but that's what it seemed like). He has also scraped and re-glazed a couple of windows. He will slowly make his way around the house scraping the over-paint off the glass and re-glazing. We have 16 windows. That may take him a while. We have also painted the nursery Aegean Blue (to match the Funky Fish bedding). Next weekend is "sister's weekend". Desiree and Summer are coming down, and my sister-in-law, Bet, is coming up from Florida. We will finish putting up the white bead board wainscot and trim. Once we get the walls done, I can buy a crib and put the furniture back in place. I think it will be a pretty bright room. I like it.

This weekend Christian's dad and brother are coming up to screen in the side porch. Last night, Christian and I stained the wood (or most of it). We went with a midnight blue. We will buy navy shutters to put on the front of the house, and eventually paint the front door and trim on the front stoop to match.

I think, after we get those two projects finished, we will move on to the front yard, and painting other rooms. I found Sherwin-Williams Harmony paint. That stuff is great! Low VOC's and no odor. We were able to get away with one coat in the nursery.

I think that is all that is/ has been going on. Of course, it is a lot. Aren't I supposed to be pampering myself? I should schedule a massage/ manicure/ pedicure. Especially since I can hardly reach my feet these days. We won't even get into the clothing issue. Sheesh!

On the fun side, I am enjoying being pregnant and knowing there is this little guy growing inside of me. It is truly amazing! I know all of you guys will not get it, but I think it is the best experience in the world. I can't wait to meet him. Just to know that I am going to introduce the world to him is an overpowering realization. I will be the one showing him the good and trying to protect him from the bad. I know that music, art, and sports will be a big part of his life. I just hope that I can teach him to be good. To love. When you start to think about it, it is quite a responsibility raising a little human. It is unfortunate that so many people seem to either not care, or not take it seriously. It also seems to be a fine line between raising a child who has complete trust in your judgement and who is open and honest with you, and being your child's friend. I am not going to be my child's friend, but I do want him to be able to come to me before anyone else for guidance. I have a lot ahead of me, but as I told Christian, it is like our life is just beginning. It's like we have been practicing being adults and getting to know each other up until this point. Now we start to live. It is exciting.

2007-02-18T11:48:00.000-05:00

What American accent do you have? Your Result: The South That's a Southern accent you've got there. You may love it, you may hate it, you may swear you don't have it, but whatever the case, we can hear it.
The Midland
Philadelphia
The West
The Northeast
The Inland North
Boston
North Central
What American accent do you have? Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

I find this very interesting. Obviously, I have a southern accent, but it looks like I picked up some Midwestern during our time in Missouri, and Christian (being born in Philly) has rubbed off on me. Funny how that happens.

2007-01-30T17:56:00.000-05:00

You know the Bible 79%!

Wow! You are truly a student of the Bible! Some of the questions were difficult, but they didn't slow you down! You know the books, the characters, the events . . . Very impressive!

Ultimate Bible Quiz
Create MySpace Quizzes

Huh. Still with me after 10 years.

2007-01-30T08:54:00.000-05:00

HAPPY 25TH BIRTHDAY DESIREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Have a safe trip back to SC.

Thoughts of Sugar Plums (or scary fish) Dance in My Head

2007-01-18T16:44:00.000-05:00

I'm thinking about a Funky Fish nursery. I know ... it could be potentially scary to an infant. Or, it could prevent the tyke from being afraid of monsters. We'll see. Either way, I think it's cool, and I'm the parent, so there.

2007-01-17T16:16:00.000-05:00

It's a Lukas Friedrich Lentz

I'm Getting Beat Up Inside

2007-01-14T09:45:00.000-05:00

Well, it is official ... I have a real, living being inside of me. I have thought that I have felt some movement for the last couple of weeks, but never having anything living inside of me before, I wasn't sure.

Last night, the kid was bouncing all over the place. It probably went on for about 10 minutes. Crazy! Amazing! It is simply impossible to put into words.

Wednesday is our ultrasound. Hopefully, the little tyke will co-operate and we will know if we need to go with blue or pink. My hunch is blue.

Otherwise, I am over my bought of depression over not fitting into any of my clothes. Spending hundreds of dollars is an amazing cure. The thing I really like is I have yet to buy maternity pants. Something about that big elastic black band that all maternity pants seem to have just puts me over the edge. It just screams "I am no longer able to be sexy", and is one step closer to mom jeans. I am not ready to go there yet. Thank goodness for low-rider pants.

Also, our best friends from Missouri are coming out Friday and staying until next Tuesday. It will be great to see them and show them our new house.

Watch Out World

2006-12-28T18:36:00.000-05:00

Well, we finally did it ....
Christian and I finally procreated.

I know, scary.

It is amazing. This is something that we have been wanting for a long time, and it is a bit surreal now that it is a reality. In thinking of having a child, all of my thoughts have been on rocking it to sleep while singing my favorite songs, reading my favorite childhood stories, sharing my background and roots so it knows where it came from. Now that it is actually going to happen, the thoughts of the sleepless nights, daycare, diapers and all the rest are starting to seep in. I can't pretend to know what it will be like. I don't know if we will have a little Lukas or Stella (although we should know that in a few weeks), I don't know if the child will be laid back or full of energy. I do know that I will love this little being unconditionally, and do everything in my power to give it the best (not easiest, but best) life it can have. I will try to teach it how to love and give. I will try to make it understand that it is extremely fortunate and should be aware of how it can help those with less (physically, mentally, emotionally). Hopefully, I will accomplish half of what I aspire to.

But, for now, I need to find some clothes that fit me, seeing that I seem to be expanding daily.

Sense of Peace

2006-11-29T16:06:00.000-05:00

Over a year has past since we moved back to the Southeast. 13 months to be exact.

This has been an extremely challenging year. The first three months of our move, we were elated to be back in the area, close to family, and eager to see how this leg of our life journey would play out. We spent our time finalizing our trip to Belize with our best friends, and kept our minds off of missing the people back in Springfield by looking forward to the next time we would see them.

After the Belize vacation, reality set in. We looked around this city we now called home, and were disgusted by the lack of leadership and community support. We were depressed at living in an apartment in a transitional part of town.

We started wondering if we had made a mistake.

We were starting to become something in Springfield, both in our careers and in the community. We had a home and neighborhood. Things were going well there. Why did we move?

After about the six month mark, we started adjusting to our new life. We started considering putting down roots and making this home as long as we were here. At about the 12 month mark, we found a home in a community that we feel we can become involved in, and that is trying to become better.

So, at 13 months, we are home.

We have a little house that we can make our own. We have a neighborhood that is on it's way up. It's close to a downtown that is striving to become better. We are surrounded by family that we get to see on a regular basis, and we are developing friendships that are helping us become better people. After a year, our lives are almost back to where we started, and it feels good.

Sure, we miss all of our friends in Springfield, and if I could move them out here I would, but they are still our friends. The distance makes our time together that much more meaningful. We are continuing to move on with our lives, and it feels good. It has been scary, sad, almost unbearable at times, but right now - it's all good.

Blog Bandwagon

2006-11-22T15:22:00.000-05:00

Yeah, I changed my background. Can't let the little sis's stay ahead of me. Actually, I was getting pretty bored with the background I had. It was a little too "non-feminine". I'm trying to add "girly" to my world. Flowers on the blog here, pink in the wardrobe there. I may even start wearing a skirt to work eventually. We'll see ... baby steps.

Well, the house projects are moving along. We (meaning Christian) have installed new deadbolts on all the exterior doors. This past weekend we installed a shelf and rod in one of the hall closets and the organizer in my closet. I'm not sure it made that big of a difference. I still have a big pile of shoes. I guess I need to be a little more selective and get rid of a few more pair. It's tough. Next week I want to concentrate on getting some semblance of order to the front bedroom. It is a mess.

We did finally get our stove and refrigerator. I haven't actually cooked anything yet, but it looks like it will do a good job. We got a GE stainless ceramic top. The stove heats up very quickly! Pretty cool. The refrigerator is GE stainless with the freezer drawer on the bottom. I love it. Having the freezer on the bottom makes it easier to see the fruits and vegetables that are about to go bad.

Otherwise, we are gearing up to go to dad's for Thanksgiving. Desiree is flying in tomorrow, and everyone should show up late afternoon for dinner. I can't wait to get some of Aunt Judy's dressing. mmmmm. I am going to make a Pumpkin Cake with Brown Butter Icing. Sounds good, we'll see how it turns out.

I hope everyone has a great Thanksgiving.

Death Becomes Us

2006-11-13T16:18:00.000-05:00

Well, there has another tragedy on my mom's side of the family. Her youngest sister died of cancer yesterday. That makes my mom, two aunts, and my grandfather all to die of cancer. Can a family be cursed? I have one aunt and cousins left on my mom's side. The ties to that family are slowly dwindling away.

I found myself a bit introspective last night, after I heard the news. I am sad because there were a few things I wanted to tell her the next time I saw her. I didn't get that chance. I did get a chance to visit with her a few months ago. It had been years since I had seen her, so I am very thankful for that time. She was a wonderfully positive person. We may not have stayed in consistent contact over the years, but everytime we talked or visited, it was great. She had recently made two scrapbooks of old pictures of my mom, and aunts and uncles. It is a great piece of history that I will treasure and pass on to my children.

While I am sad and regretful over this loss, it is not overwhelming. Since my mom's death, I find myself looking at death differently. I think it hurts the ones left behind more than the person who dies. That being said, how do we minimize that pain? One thing that I do is try to look at the positive in the situation. What can I learn from the persons life, how they lived or how they died? How can I then, take those lessons and apply it to my life to make me a better person? It seems to be working.

Another thought that is weighing on me is the repetition of cancer deaths. Will it also affect our generation? Are my sisters, cousins and me destined to die early deaths of cancer? I cannot accept that I may only have 10-20 years left on this earth. That is not enough time. I want to have kids and see them grow up. I want to have to take care of my husband when we are old. I have things that I have to do. I do eat healthy and occasionally exercise. I will be more diligent with that. I will also be more proactive in getting screened for various cancers. I am going to beat this curse. But, if I don't everyone should celebrate my life, not mourn.

A Sigh of Relief

2006-11-08T14:14:00.000-05:00

I am so glad the elections are over. Not because I am not politically minded, but because I get tired of the slandering ads. I am not going to go into it, because the whole thing makes me really angry, but I am glad it is over for now.

We are quickly getting settled in to our home. I have all of the rooms put together and unpacked except the mudroom and spare bedroom. Christian has been installing deadbolts on the doors, so his tools are all over the mudroom. The spare bedroom is another story. It is the catch all room. A lot of it will move out to one of the storage rooms in the garage, but most of it needs a home that only exists in boxes. I need a library. By that, I mean, I need (at least) an entire room to keep my books. Do you think 10 boxes of books is too much? I even got rid of a few before we moved from Springfield. Of course, I have bought and read about 20 books this past year. Does this constitute a problem? Other than lack of storage space, I don't think so. Reading is extremely important. To be able to escape into your imagination is a trait I am seeing disappear in the younger generation. When I have children, they are not going to have electronic toys, they are not going to have video games, movies, or tv to keep their attention. Well, maybe Sesame Street will be okay. They will have books (big surprise there), building toys, balls, and a bike. All of their toys will fit in one basket. (hey, I won't have room for toys and my books).

Okay, I kind of went off on a tangent with that. Anyway, we are getting settled in. Next week, we will be adding some closet organizers, and possibly painting the hall. I am going for a burnt orange color.

I also have a new energy to get involved with the community again. I've been on hiatus for the past year, and that is more than enough. Owning a home and establishing roots was one of the things that we were missing from Springfield. We still miss all of our friends, but at least we are getting some peace of mind.

Oh Yeah

2006-10-23T08:30:00.000-05:00

Well, I didn't get fired (if any of you were wondering). Actually, things are going a little better. Not great, but better. For a few months, I started pursuing a career change. I still want to go for it, but it is on hold for a while. I decided I would like to become an art teacher. South Carolina has the PACE program that would allow me to get my teaching certificate in three years. I guess teaching is in the Burdette blood. Anyway, I want to finish my architecture registration, and since I didn't pass the past two tests I took, I have to wait six months to retake them. All that being said, I am going to concentrate on studying for the tests in February and March (I think I got a little distracted with the idea of the career change). After I pass those, then I will pursue my certification. Makes sense. So, if all goes well, I will be a registered architect, with my Masters, I can teach college architecture, and I will become an art teacher. Good to have options.

In other news, Christian and I are closing on a house in a week. It is in North Augusta, SC, and only 1.5 miles from my job. It is a cute two bedroom, one bath brick cottage in downtown North Augusta. It has been renovated, but we still have a list of projects to do (paint, deck, screen in porch ...). We are very excited about having a place to call home again. It will also be good to get out of Georgia, and back to SC.

Other than that, we've been enjoying the kayaks, and visiting with family and friends. Life is good.

2006-08-10T15:38:00.000-05:00

I am going to end up getting fired.

I have never worked for a man who frustrated me more. I find myself either literally biting my tongue to keep from lashing out, or allowing my frustration to slowly seep out into my responses to him. Luckily, it is not just me that finds his actions irritating. I often get “looks” from our office manager, too. At least I am not alone.

What, you may ask, could cause such a levelheaded girl, such as myself, to want to tear someone a new one? It is hard to point to just one thing. It seems it is an accumulation of events over the course of a day or week that just takes me to the brink. I honestly think the old man is going batty. So, what is my solution? Try to figure out how he wants things done before I do them in order to eliminate future lashings. This battiness, coupled with his son’s (the VP of the firm) inability to pass on information, makes me think that, if I don’t get fired, I will go crazy. This is a test. I am getting good at spotting tests because it seems I have had many of them in my recent life. I will learn something from this, I just don’t know what yet. Patience, young one.

In Pursuit of Happiness

2006-07-04T12:33:00.000-05:00

For those of you who watch the CBS Sunday Morning Show, you know that this topic is directly taken from one of the articles on this past Sunday's show. The segment spoke of how our founding fathers granted us the pursuit of happiness, but questioned what, exactly, did that mean.

For each individual, the pursuit of happiness takes on a different meaning. For some, it may revolve around a better understanding and relationship with God. For others, it may be measured in their rise on the ladder of status. Whatever the end result might be, I believe the pursuit is the most important aspect.

As humans, we are comforted by the idea of completeness. Seeing a "finished" product, whether it be a home improvement project or a personal goal reached, fills us with satisfaction and accomplishment. However, how many people are satisfied to stop there? We all move on to the next goal or project. The truth is, no matter how hard we try, we will never be complete. We will never live in a complete environment. We are constantly in the process of becoming. The idea of being is fleeting.

So, in this pursuit, are we aware of the satisfaction that is in the action of getting there, and not in the end product itself? I think the acknowledgement of this allows the idea of happiness to be reconsidered. Some may believe that once they acquire x-amount of wealth or knowledge, then they will be happy. If this is the mindset, happiness will never be reached. If, however, you find your happiness in the pursuit, it will be a state that can be constantly sustained.

Also, happiness cannot be wrapped up in material goods. Happiness is an attitude, not a end result.

happiness
n 1: state of well-being characterized by emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy 2: emotions experienced when in a state of well-being

So, on this day that celebrates the independence and spirit of this country, I wish you all what our forefather's wished - much happiness.

It is closer than you think.

Memories

2006-05-26T15:34:00.000-05:00

It seems every time my family get together, we end up reminiscing at some point. Back to the "good ol' days". My dad has recently been telling us some doozies (Desiree, if you need writing material, look no further than dear old dad). This got me thinking. Who is going to tell these stories when we are gone? You hope that you will pass your stories to your children and they will pass them to their children, but I don't know that to be the case. My dad has some great stories, but am I going to pass his stories or my stories on? It'll be hard enough to reach back into my memory 30+ years to recall my childhood. I don't think I will actually be able to recall his, too.

Dad, the solution: you need to spend your free time (now that you have plenty of it) and write your memories.

I would encourage everyone to start jotting down their favorite childhood stories. We all like to tell them, it would be a shame for them to disappear. To get things started, I thought I would relay a couple of my own here. It would be great if you all shared one or two of your favorite memories, too.

Things that I remember, in general, about my childhood are being with immediate and extended family. As I got older, friends started entering the picture, but I find that the majority of my memories contain family episodes. I think that speaks volumes of the way I was raised. I don't remember a particular toy or clothes. None of the material things. Just people.

When I was about two or three we lived in an apartment complex. When I went back a few years ago to see it from an adults' perspective, I discovered that I grew up in the ghetto. I am not sure that it was the ghetto at the time, but it was for the fiscally challenged. Mom worked during the days, dad went to grad school at night. There really wasn't any money. I remember our living room furniture being outdoor lounge chairs (the kind with the webbing over a metal frame). Part of the apartment complex was for the elderly, and my granny lived there. I remember walking across the street to go visit my granny. (By street, I mean parking lot driveway). A man named Walter Mason lived beside granny. Every time I walked by his apartment, I would go up to his door (if he wasn't sitting on the porch) and say "Hey, boy!" I would also occasionally ask him for cheese. Why a three year old started calling a 60 year old man "boy", I cannot tell you, but I think he enjoyed it.

Happiness in Six Months

2006-05-04T15:33:00.000-05:00

So, evidently it takes a human about six months, after a major life altering event, to return to their "normal" level of happiness.

Why wasn't I told this before? At least I could have been prepared to combat the moving blues.

Well, at least it is over, and I have survived. Now back to life.

News on the Augusta front goes like this: our house in Springfield is now under contract. We expect to close on June 9th. That is good news for so many reasons. We had started putting an asterisk behind all of our statements and plans for the future:
We are going to buy kayaks*
*when our house sells.

Away with the asterisk!!!!
Let the spending begin!!!!

Having never sold a house before, and having never had the prospect of a large sum of money coming our way, we are a bit giddy. Don't worry, we are not going to spend on frivolous things. We are going to buy a small house in Augusta. Might as well make it home as long as we are here. We are also going to buy a new car. Looking into a hybrid. Then we can get rid of the clunker truck we are borrowing from dad. I mean, thanks dad, for letting us borrow your truck.

Other than that, we'll look for a way to invest the remainder, and start saving again. It has been no fun paying mortgage and utilities in Springfield and rent and utilities in Augusta. That lifted burden will be great.

Not much else is going on. We were in Florida last weekend. I was helping my sister-in-law redo my three year old nephews bedroom. We did a train theme, and it turned out pretty good. It was also Eric's birthday, so we went out for dinner with the family. Good time. Next weekend we'll be in Walhalla for a family get together, and the weekend after we are going to spend a day on Lake Murray with one of Christian's former co-workers. So much for not having anything to do this month. I imagine next month will be full of car and house shopping. I hope to get into a house by the end of the summer. Thanksgiving in Augusta, anyone?

Work is going okay. It is still slow, but I am typically busy throughout the day.

Christian wants to get my road bike when we are in SC this weekend, so I see some evening rides in my future.

2006-04-25T15:47:00.000-05:00

It is no easier to say goodbye
than it was the first time we had to go.
The thought of it still makes me cry,
although my head tells me it shouldn't be so.

The pain comes unexpectedly.
My heart is still empty
Although, it shouldn't be.

On the exterior the world looks bright.
Underneath, it's a different sight.
The hollowness, despair just won't go away.
I try to see the good in each new day.

Small reminders of the life we left
Keep creeping in and showing themselves.
Our home stands empty pulling us back.
Our hearts are there, but it would be off track.

We must stay our course, and work it through.
It has to get easier, it must, it's true.
But until then, my heart will hurt
The tears will flow
And a very little piece of me will die
Because we have to go.

Tour de Georgia

2006-04-18T09:30:00.000-05:00

Yesterday we went to the team presentation. It was awesome to be feet away from some of the best cyclists in the world - Fast Freddie, Floyd Landis, Tom Danielson, countless European riders that I am not going to attempt to spell their names ...

In about an hour I will head out to see the start of the Tour de Georgia. I hope to get on a good corner and be able to video tape the riders coming toward me and turning. Ahhh what power that is going to be. I am soooooo excited!!!! Oh, and Phil Liggit stood beside us yesterday. I wanted to reach over and touch him, but I also didn't want to be classified as psycho, so I kept my hands to myself.

I'll post pics tonight. Can you post video on this blog thing?

Jokes

2006-04-16T15:22:00.000-05:00

In cleaning out closets and dressers last week, I ran across my "joke book". This is not a book of amusing saying to provoke laughter, but a book I made of "poems" I wrote in my college years. I called them jokes, because I thought poetry was a joke. I thought when I had to write my first poem in high school, it was a joke. So, in writing my thought down in a non-traditional pattern of words, I deemed them "jokes". I thought I would start including one on this blog every so often. I don't claim to be a poet, or that this is even poetry or good or anything, but it is from me and I am sharing it with you.

joke i

THE MOON FALLS INTO THE OCEAN AS ICE WOULD
FALL INTO A GLASS OF WHISKEY
exploding.
BURNING THE FISH
OVER AN OPEN FIRE
hot.
SWEAT POURING FROM THE PORCELAIN SKIN
TURNING RED - DRIPPING BLOOD
death.
SLEEPING FOREVER - NEVER WAKING
LIGHTENING FLASHES - CLOUDS BURST OPEN
life.
SUDDENLY LIGHT FILLS EVERY SPACE
BLINDINGLY WAKING EVERYTHING
cold.
WHITE LIGHT COVERING THE EARTH
LIKE SNOW
evaporating.
THE EARTH AND EVERYTHING IN IT IS
SWALLOWED UP AS SOMEONE WOULD SWALLOW
THE LAST DROP IN A GLASS OF WHISKEY
peace.
tranquility.
nothing.
everything.
here.
gone.
lasting.
stopping.
forgetting.
remembering.
EXPLODING!

2006-04-10T17:02:00.000-05:00

Ran: 1 mile
Walked: 1/2 mile
Ran: 1/2 mile

I exceeded my goals and ran for a total of 1 1/2 miles.

Can't wait for Wednesday!

I'm Going To Do It ...

2006-04-10T15:18:00.000-05:00

... I am going to run this afternoon. Really, I am. My goal is one mile. That may be a lofty goal seeing that I haven't exercised in seven months, but I'm going for it.

None of this couch to 5k stuff.

Nuh uh, not for me.

Guts or glory.

Going all out.

ONE MILE!!!!!!

For Desiree ....

2006-04-07T14:33:00.000-05:00

I, too, had big hair at a young age. Age seven ... angel wings (yes after the hairstyle inspired by THE Charlies Angels)!

2006-04-05T12:09:00.000-05:00

Since everyone else in my family is showing off how cute they were, I thought I would join in ....

2006-04-03T10:55:00.000-05:00

We currently find ourselves in limbo, once again.

I am not going to go into details why we are in limbo, but there may be a move in our near future.

It would be a good move. A long-term move. A move that would get us back to a community that we can invest our money, time and emotions into.

As most of you know, we have not been happy in Augusta. We moved here to get closer to family and to give Christian new opportunities in his career. We knew, when we moved, that we were not going to be here long term. This is a stepping-stone for Christian. Once we got here, we went through a period of mourning for what we had “lost”. That, coupled with the fact that Augusta has problems, big problems, made our attitude toward our current situation very sour. Now, that we are past the mourning, we are still left with the fact that this is not a city that we really want to invest ourselves in. There are too many issues and we don’t want to be here long enough to try to solve any of them. Is that a selfish attitude on our part? I am beginning to think it is.

It is easy to go into a community that has the right attitude, and is obviously taking steps in the positive direction, and get involved. It is not so easy to go into a community that has problems we have never had to experience, and try to get them going in a positive direction. Especially, if we know we won’t be here for more that a few years. If this current situation does not work out, and we are in Augusta for a while, I have to change my attitude. I will not become a better person by sitting back and saying how bad this city is.

No, I may not be able to make a difference, but I can try. I think I would like to focus on children and a reading program. There are so many children in this city that have no advantages. They have no one to set a positive example for them. They have no sense of chance. I have the ability to give that to them. It’s not like I am going to get involved in a neighborhood or downtown. I really have nothing else to do.

So, if we stay, I’m going to get involved. I am going to make the most of my time here. I am going to enjoy this phase of our life and learn as much as I can from it. If we move, we will be moving to a community that will be easy to get involved with, so there won’t be an issue.

2006-03-29T10:38:00.000-05:00

I received this from a friend today. I know that I have become very guilty of constantly looking ahead at what needs to be accomplished or what life will be like "if" and not savoring the here and now. Chores can wait, most things aren't that important, the future will come without us rushing it. Here is just a little reminder to "Slow Down"

Have you ever watched kids on a merry-go-round?
Or listened to the rain slapping on the ground?
Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?
You better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
Do you run through each day on the fly?
When you ask how are you?
Do you hear the reply?
When the day is done do you lie in your bedwith the next hundred chores running through your head?
You'd better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
Ever told your child, we'll do it tomorrow?
And in your haste, not see his sorrow?
Ever lost touch, let a good friendship die
cause you never had time to call and say "Hi".
You'd better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
When you run so fast to get somewhere you miss half the fun of getting there.
When you worry and hurry through your day,
it is like an unopened gift thrown away.
Life is not a race.
Do take it slower.
Hear the music before the song is over.

2006-03-22T08:57:00.000-05:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

SUMMER (20)

AND

CHRISTIAN (34)!!!!

Birthday

2006-03-21T17:30:00.000-05:00

Okay, so my birthday was a couple of weeks ago and I meant to write a post, but time got away from me. To sum it up:

got good stuff
dad and Summer came down for dinner
neighbors came over for cake
had great time with new friends and family

The highlight gift (which I bought for myself "from" Christian):

Fun with knife and cake:

2006-03-08T17:39:00.000-05:00

My mom died ten years ago today.

The day before my 22nd birthday.

I have to be honest and say I did not think about it until my dad sent an email relaying a message he had received in a card.

That made me feel guilty, but at the same time, it is not like I have forgotten her. I have a thought of her almost everyday that goes by. I aspire to live my life in a way that will honor hers.

It is hard to believe that 10 years has passes so quickly. I have done so much in that time. I have become such a different person. When she died, I was two months away from graduating from college. I had a boyfriend of almost a year (who is now my wonderful husband). I was enjoying school, trying to be an independent young adult, getting ready to step out into the world and make it mine.

The morning she died, my youngest sister came in and woke me up to tell me. I couldn't cry. She was 10 and needed to know everything was going to be okay. We were going to make it. We all still had each other. The rest of that morning was a blur. I remember taking my mom's engagement ring and wedding band off her hand before she was taken to the funeral home. They were hard to get off and I was afraid I was going to hurt her if I pulled too hard. At some point, I called Christian to let him know. He was already in classes, so I had to ask the secretary to tell him it was urgent he call me. I don't remember what I said to him. He talked to his professors and skipped out of classes that morning. Later that day, I went to studio to explain to my classmates what was going on and I didn't think I would be in class for a couple of days. There were six of us doing a design-build project that semester for our senior exit project. I remember they were all meeting and I walked up to the group and started telling them that my mom had died. Christian was standing beside me. I could hardly get the words out before the tears came. I think that was the first time that day I allowed myself to cry. All I remember was walking downstairs, sitting on a bench and a couple of the guys just sitting beside me with their arm around me. No words needed to be said.

That night we had the viewing. The next day the funeral. The amount of people that attended was astounding. Some how I made it through the remainder of that semester and graduated. I didn't get into grad school until the next year, so I worked. Emotionally, I think I was pretty numb for a few years. I don't know how Christian could endure my moods. It was a tough time, to say the least.

In the past ten years, I graduated from undergrad, got my Masters of Architecture, got married, moved half way across the country and back, learned that people can be really bad and really good, made friends with people that enrich my life, learned what love truly is and that it can come in many different forms, watched my sisters grow from little girls into young women, watched my dad piece his life back together and become strong again, experienced the new life of friends and nephews, and have learned what is important in life, what isn't and what makes me happy.

I can't wait to see what the next ten years has to hold. I can only continue to live a life that will honor my mom.

2006-03-06T13:47:00.000-05:00

I sent this email out a few days ago. Below it are the responses I got .... interesting.

Describe me in ONE WORD...just one word!
Send it to me only, then send this message to your friends and see how many strange things people say about you!Just hit reply and send me my one word back. Then forward this message on to your friends (including me) and see what they say about you!
GAME ON!!
This may not work out the way I would like for it to, but you have to be honest!

casual
creative
enigmatic
evolving
hip
hungry
imbroglio
introspective
thoughtful
passionate

Random Thoughts For a Thursday Afternoon

2006-03-02T17:36:00.000-05:00

Not much is happening in Augusta these days. Well, I mean, I am sure a lot is happening in the city itself, but not in our household specifically. The weather has been spectacular the past few days. The frustrating part is it is great weather to go out and start working in the yard, but alas, we are without. So, for all of you who do have a yard - enjoy it!

We are gearing up for visitors almost every other weekend for the next two months. It will be great to get some of our friends out here and show them our new home and my old stomping grounds. Plus, I am ready to entertain! For someone who loves to throw a party, I am going through serious withdrawal. I have a feeling that I am going to be doing a lot of baking and cooking for everyone. I've already gotten several ideas from my latest Southern Living.

We had an interesting event happen Monday. Christian woke me up at 6:00 in the morning and told me there was a homeless man sleeping on the landing of the stairs outside our apartment door. Mind you, we are on the third floor. So, I get up, get my cell phone and watch out the peep hole as Christian goes to get him to leave. I told Christian, before he went out the door, to knock on our neighbors door and get Doug to "back him up". Our landing has two sets of stairs. One goes north and one south with a dividing wall and two doors in between. The apartment doors open onto the south side of the wall. This guy was on the north side. Christian opens the door closest to our apartment and Doug opens the one next to his apartment door. The guy is sleeping on the other side of that door, and ends up getting banged in the head. Of course, he wakes up and leaves, no arguments, nothing. When Christian gets back from working out, we discuss the morning adventure over our morning cup o' joe. Christian is talking about whether he should have called the cops, etc. I spent the morning wondering if I should have given him something to eat. Interesting the two different views. Christian is much more skeptical. I feel bad for not helping the guy.

It is hard to know when to reach out and when to be on guard. Many times, one comes across a person who seems down on their luck and they are just trying to scam you. We have experienced that. It is easy to not trust, but at the same time, if you can buy someone a lunch, isn't it your duty? It is a sad state when you do not feel you can help someone because you fear your own safety.

On another note, I am over half way through the Da Vinci Code. That is an excellent read. I laugh at all the controversy it is causing. I wouldn't say that the literature is excellent. Not a Faulkner or Hemingway, but a fun, fast read.

It Always Comes In Threes ...

2006-02-20T16:26:00.000-05:00

We had the "mournful" week ....
We had my back going out ...
We had the clutch go out in our car ...

That's it! That's three! Bring on the happiness!

Actually, I want to thank all of our friends and family for helping us get through the tough times we've had recently. I don't know why our move hit us so late, but it did, and it hit hard. However, everyone rallied around us and brought us back to the fact that, although it was difficult at the time, and it is still a little difficult, we did make the right decision for us. We will be able to grow in our careers, in our personal life, and who knows what else will come our way!

As far as my back goes, it still hurts, but after a week off of work, I am trying to hobble through the day. I have an appointment with an orthopedic specialist next Tuesday. Hopefully, it won't be too serious and time will heal it. Until then I'll just look like an old woman hunched over and walking slow.

And three ... we were on our way to Hilton Head Island Friday evening (about 10 miles out of town) when the engine started racing and smoke started coming out of the car. We pull over and a nice man stops and immediately tells us the clutch is out. He directs us back down the road about a mile to a service station. The owner looks at the car, confirms the diagnosis, and tells us not to drive above 40 mph. So, we head back to the apartment where we switch vehicles (my dad has been kind enough to let us use his beater of a truck) and head back down the road. The ride was not as comfy, and by the time we get to HHI, my back is killing me! But, we made it and there was a delicious lasagna dinner waiting for us. Our room had a two person jacuzzi tub that I took advantage of Saturday afternoon. I know I am trying to simplify my life, but our next house HAS to have one of those!!!! It was perfect for easing my back pain.

We had a great weekend with Christian's brother and his family. It was great to see the kids! We even got to celebrate Stephen's 15th birthday!

So, $1100 later, the clutch is fixed and our life is back to normal.

When It Rains, It Pours

2006-02-13T08:49:00.000-05:00

I have died, my soul is trapped in purgatory, and I am looking down on my old life in Springfield and mourning because I can no longer be a part of it.

Not just sad. Gut wrenching sobbing because of the loss I feel.

This was my weekend.

We moved to Augusta to be closer to family, to give Christian the opportunity to further his career, and because I wanted to get back "home" - the South. Well, it hurts. Augusta is not the type of city we can live in. There are so many things that are wrong, corrupt, not available. My job is just depressing. We have started mourning the life we built together. The life we left.

Christian and I moved to Springfield a few months after I graduated from grad school. It was where we matured. It is where our professions matured. It is where we met the best friends of our life. It is where we bought our first home. It is where we were a vital part of the community and neighborhood. We were doing things. We were making a difference.

It is where we put down our first roots.

Now they have been ripped up and I don't know when and where they will start to grow again.

My heart is breaking ...

... but I have to endure.

Push through it. Keep my eye on the positive. Tuck in those emotions and be strong. I know it is "right", but why does doing the right thing have to hurt so much?

On top of all of that, I threw my back out yesterday.

Pray for us.

2006-01-30T09:16:00.000-05:00

HAPPY 24TH BIRTHDAY DESIREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yipppeeee!!!

2006-01-27T21:05:00.000-05:00

I just got the CD I ordered: Big Smith & Family "From Hay to Zzzzzz: Hillbilly Songs For Kids". I love it. My favorite song is "Leap As You Run". What a great song to listen to to get yourself back to the basics in life! It takes me back to my carefree childhood and running barefoot through the woods in upstate South Carolina. Ahhhhhh! Happiness abounds. We should all leap as we run through life. Break it up a bit. Have some fun. Enjoy the simple pleasures.

Don't Put All Your Eggs In The Sunshine Basket

2006-01-25T13:29:00.000-05:00

We are back.

The trip to Belize was great. The plan (at least for me and Dave) were to sit on the beach and relax. The relaxing was definitely accomplished. I will try to recap the last eight days:

Day 1: Christian and I wake up at 3:00 am, shower, finish packing and drive to Atlanta to catch our flight. We have a layover in Miami, so it is mid-afternoon when we get into Belize City. We then get on a puddle jumper to take us to Placencia. It is about a 30 minute ride, but we had several stops to pick up other passengers and cargo. That was an fun trip. The "runways" at each stop are barely long enough for landing and taking off. There is no taxiway, no lights, no paving. There were a couple of times that we didn't see where we were going to land until we were right on top of the dirt runway. We land in Placencia and Alex is waiting to take us to the Maya Breeze Inn. The road we travel (as are most roads in the whole country) is unpaved and very bumpy. The van ride to the Inn took about 20 minutes. We passed through the village of Seine Bight. This is a Garifuna village. Driving through, you realize that you are, indeed, in a third world country. The "housing" can barely be classified as shacks in our country. I am not sure that there would be running water, electricity or indoor plumbing in most of these structures. It is like what you see on the advertisements for "Feed the Children". We get to the Inn, check in, and hit the beach. We still had about two hours of sunlight left.

This is the view from the front porch of our cabana:

This is our cabana:

We sat on the beach and soaked in the rays, then headed to dinner. We were both exhausted, so we hit the bed early.

Day 2: We awake to overcast skies, but no rain. After breakfast we hit the beach to sit back and relax. Christian, of course, could not do this for long, so he took the kayak out along the coast and into the lagoon behind the Inn. That evening we go get dinner and again hit bed early. Let me mention that sunrise was about 6 and sundown is around 6:30, so it kind of throws the schedule.

Day 3: We woke up to forcasts of a rainy day. Instead of sitting in our cabana all day, we decided to take a tour inland and went to the ancient city of Xunantunich. The ruins are amazing, and the views were spectacular.

This is a view of El Castillo (the temple):

This is a veiw from on top of El Castillo. We were only a few miles from Guatamala:

The drive was 3 hours each way. We went North on the Southern Highway, Northwest on the Hummingbird Highway, and West on the Western Highway (there are only two other highways in the country). We were up in the mountains and the views were unbelievable. I would post more pics to accompany these descriptions, but evidently I have already reached the limit of post pics. After the tour, we had lunch in San Ignacio. The cusine in Belize is very Spanish influenced. When we got back to the Inn, the Fenders were there waiting for us. That is when the vacation began! Christian and Lynee immediately jumped into the kayaks and went along the coast for about half an hour. Dave and I got a drink and laughed at them. When they got back we went to dinner and started catching up.

Day 4: Sunny skies!!!! We all hit the beach after breakfast and soaked up as many rays as possible. Christian hitched a ride into Placencia Village to go to the ATM. When he got back, he and Lynee got back in the kayaks and went out to False Caye to do some snorkling. Dave and I sat on the beach. (Do you see a pattern here?) We just drank, talked and enjoyed the day.

Day 5: Christian and Lynee went on the Monkey River Tour where they took a boat up the Monkey River. They hiked in the jungle and saw Howler Monkeys. Dave and I sat around and talked. It was rainy most of the day, so we stayed on the porch. We had some great conversations. It is great to be able to grow closer to friends. That night we we had some more great food and conversation.

Day 6: We had signed up to go out on a sailboat and snorkle, but the trip was cancelled due to the weather. It ended up being partly cloudy and we had some rain, but headed into Placencia Village. There were a few shops and resturants, but after a while we discovered that most of everything was the same. We stopped in a bar and had a drink, then headed back to the Inn. Dinner, drinking, conversation.

Day 7: More rain. We spent the morning bird watching. It cleared up a little, so we hit the beach and threw the football and frisbee. More lazing about.

Day 8: Our last day, and guess what? It rained. We had breakfast, packed and then hung out until we had to be shuttled to the airport. We had a couple of hours to browse through the gift shops in the Belize airport. Bought some knick knack patty whacks, and enjoyed the last bit of time we had with our friends. We got back home around 1:00 this morning.

The trip: amazing. Why? We got to spend time with our best friends. We could have been anywhere, and it would have been great. Leaving them (again) was incredibly difficult. Christian and I both cried when we got on the plane. I think this was harder than leaving them in Springfield. We also had an amazing chance to experience a country that is so unlike ours. I have a lot to say about this, so I think I will post that at another time. I will also post all of our pics.

Going, Going, Gone

2006-01-15T17:05:00.000-05:00

So, this is probably my last blog for the next nine days. We leave for Belize EARLY Tuesday morning. Our flight leaves from Atlanta at 8:59 am. We have a layover in Miami and should land in Belize City at 1:45 pm. After a 30 minute ride in a puddle jumper to Placencia and a car ride to our inn, we should be there in plenty of time for a dip in the ocean, a little sun and off to a good dinner. After that, nothing but beach, ocean and mixed drinks for me. I guess there will be some snorkling and a few jaunts into the nearby villages, but nothing too stressful.

You know it is going to be a good vacation if you can fit everything for eight days into a 24" duffle bag!
So long everyone! Talk to you when we get back ..............................

I Can't See

2006-01-09T17:51:00.000-05:00

Latest adventure:

I went home for lunch yesterday. While watching tv and eating, the power went out in the whole apartment. I thought nothing of it and headed back to the office. When I got home at 5:00 the power was still out. I checked the breakers - all on. I called maintenance and they said they would send someone over. I went across the hall to check with the neighbors. They had power and he went to check the main breaker for me - on. Then I thought to call Christian and make sure he hadn't forgotten to pay a bill. Highly unlikely, but just wanted to check. He informed me that we had never received a power bill. Since October.

I call the power company.

No, the account is not in your name, it is still in the property managers name.
Yes, your power has been turned off because the bill hasn't been paid.
Yes, we can open an account in your name.
The power will be turned back on between 8 and 5 tomorrow.

TOMORROW???!!!!?!!? What am I supposed to do? No light, no hot water, no electricity?

So, we get room at a hotel. Hopefully the power will be on when I go home for lunch.

I Don't Know Where I'm Going, But I Sure Know Where I've Been

2006-01-07T10:00:00.000-05:00

I have been asked about my faith. I thought I would get it all out, past and present. It may help many of you know me better, and it may help me straighten some things out for myself. So, here it goes ...

I will start off with a little background.

I was raised Christian, but not in the traditional way. I was taught the entire bible. Christ came and died for our sins, but he did not do away with the teachings of the old testament. So, we kept the holy days found in the old testament. We did not eat "unclean" meat. We kept Saturday as the Sabbath. We did not celebrate Christmas, Easter, Halloween, etc. I was diligent in obeying all of the rules until I reached 18 or 19. At that point, I was getting to the age that I could be baptized in the church. I did not feel that I was being called. I stopped going to church. I also took anthropology in college, and that raised questions, in my mind, about the validity of what I had grown up believing.

At the age of 21 we found out my mom had cancer. One year later, the day before my 22nd birthday, she died. One night I prayed and asked God to heal her or relieve her of her pain. The next morning my younger sister woke me up to tell me my mom was dead.

How could I trust and obey a God that took my mom away after I asked him for help?

I hated Him.

Even as I write this, the pain of that moment surfaces like it happened yesterday.

So, from that moment I stopped believing in this God. I found the strength in myself to get over the loss of my mom. A few years ago I went through a major depression. It was through my own strength that I was able to get through it. So, here I am. I know I have an internal strength. I know I cannot go back to what I once knew as Truth. But, I know that there is wisdom beyond me. I am trying to get a balance in my life, in my attitude, in the way I treat others.

I have recently started studying Buddhism. I found that it follows along the lines that I had been thinking, but it gives me an outside teaching and understanding that I could not have found internally. I do not think my way of thought is the right, only way. I believe that everyone should find a peace in spirituality or religion, but it does not have to be the same teaching. If it makes you take stock of your actions, if it emphasizes love for others, if it teaches you and causes you to be a basic "good" person, then I am all for it. It may not be for me, personally, but I am not going to judge you for not believing as I do, and I ask the same in return. I think we are all looking for the same things, but there are so many ways to reach the summit (whatever that may be). And we don't all have to have the same goal. I don't necessarily care if there is a life after this one. I want to make the most of this life, and if it pays off afterward, then that's a bonus. I can't live this life hoping for something that may or may not come.

So, that is where I am and where I've been. Where this leads me is anyone's guess. It is both exciting and scary. The one hope I have is I can touch as many people as my mom did. You would have thought a dignitary had died at the sight of her funeral procession. And in many ways, it was true. I just wish she knew.

Architects (eye roll)

2006-01-06T12:53:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year

2006-01-05T09:52:00.000-05:00

Okay. New rule. For every "negative" blog entry, I need to write a positive entry. After a few comments and reviewing my recent blogs, I have been a little down. Things aren't really THAT bad.

We had a great New Years Eve and New Year. We had our first visitor from Springfield!!!! They came in from Savannah Saturday late afternoon. We invited our across the hall neighbors over and had a nice little spread of appetizers and spirits. The neighbors brought over the makings for martinis, so the apple-tinis were flowing. We had a lot of fun with that. (for all of you "Scrubs" fans - you know what I'm talking about). At 9:00 we headed to downtown Augusta for tapas, more martini's, and a lot of great conversation. The resturant served us a glass of champange with dinner. After that, we decided that none of us wanted to go to a bar for the ringing in of the new year, so we headed back to our apartment. Don't worry, we only live a few blocks from downtown, so we were walking the whole time. Things get a little confusing, but we did end up on the roof of our apartment. What a great view! Since our neighbors and us are the only two apartments on the third floor, we have a great secret roof top patio. We partied into the night (actually, I think 1:30 was the bedtime - we are all over 25).

The next morning we woke up (without a hangover, thankfully), and Christian used his mad-cooking skills to whip up omlettes, bacon and bagels. Very tasty! We got dressed and went out to show our guests Augusta. The weather was perfect! We went to the Riverwalk (boy, I can't wait to get our kayaks so we can enjoy the river more), drove through town and up to the headwaters. It was so beautiful up there. I love any body of water, so being this close is great. It'll help when it is a little warmer. After that, we went back to the apartment and said our good-byes. Later that afternoon Christian and I went to see Syriana. Good movie, but I have no idea what was going on.

All in all, the new year had a great start. We drove around Monday and found the neighborhood we want to live in. Hopefully we can find a decent priced house - what is up with the housing prices these days? I also hooked up my wireless to my laptop. That is awesome!!!!

The next couple of weekends will be spent running errands and getting ready for our trip. Fun times!

2006

2006-01-04T17:44:00.000-05:00

Well, midnight came and went (and a few days since) and here we are in 2006. Funny, feels like 2005.

I don't make new year resolutions. The point would be???

I will make goals for 2006.

This is the year I will finally become a registered architect. Although, I don't want to be an architect any more.

Other than that, who knows what will happen. We may have a baby, we may buy a house, we may do a lot of things, but at this point, those type of things don't really matter.

I will continue to struggle daily with my attitude toward society and the human race in general. I will try to enjoy the little things I come across.
I will try to appreciate what I have and not worry so much about what I want.
I will listen to lots of good music.
I will read tons of books.
I will soak up the sun when I have the opportunity.
I will hang out and have great conversation with friends and family.
I will drink a lot of wine.
I will generally enjoy life this year.
What else have I got to do?

My Latest Tat

2005-12-30T12:43:00.000-05:00

Joy To My World

2005-12-26T18:24:00.000-05:00

I do not believe Christmas was the day Christ was born (I don't even believe in Christ in the traditional way). I was brought up in a Christian religion, but I was not brought up keeping Christmas. I am now married to a man whose family keeps Christmas, goes to church, the whole nine yards. Since marriage, I have participated in the Christmas traditions of giving gifts and visiting family. I still have no religious tie to this day. All that being said, we have just gotten back from another Christmas season with his family.

It was a bit melancholy.

I'm not sure why. I was not into the "buying" season beforehand. I was not into the day, getting up early, watching the kids open way too many gifts. I was not into all the gluttony and stuffing myself until I felt I couldn't (or shouldn't) eat for a week. I am disenchanted.

I was into seeing my nephews, spending hours having thought-provoking conversation with my in-laws, and sleeping in.

There were two highlights to the past few days.

The first was showing up to my brother- and sister-in-law's and them telling me that my three year old nephew woke up that morning (Christmas morning) yelling: "Aunt Heather, Aunt Heather! Where are you? I want Aunt Heather!" What a boost to the ego to know that I won over Santa Claus. The second highlight was opening a gift from my husband and finding a beginners guide to Buddhism. Ah! the irony!

I think I was very introspective this season. I am starting to see that I have too much "stuff". I am not in the mood to increase my possessions, but I am trying to understand ways that I can move to a more simple life. A life that is more spiritually satisfying. I am also not in the mood to increase the amount that others possess. I look at what others have, and do not see fairness in the distribution.

I am also missing having children. We have been trying for a couple of years. Nothing. I try to stay positive and believe there is a reason, but that is all I want in my life. I love kids. I want nothing more than to have that helpless being to love. I want a child that I can teach. That I can read to. That I can sing to. That I can just sit and look at for hours. Many of our friends have been blessed with children this past year. I am so happy for all of them, but at the same time, I am jealous. That is not a very giving attitude, but this is one area that I am going to remain selfish. I so enjoyed holding our friends children and our nephews, but it's not the same as having my own. Maybe I am not meant to have a child. Maybe my energies are meant to be shared elsewhere. I hope this is not the truth, but it may be a reality I will need to accept.

So, at the end of this holiday season, I am not satisfied. I am a bit reflective at the closing of this year. More so than I have ever been before. I am glad, because in many ways I have discovered many things that are about to launch my life into a different (and hopefully better) path. But, I also realize things are not going to get easier. I have a lot of work to do to be and become the person I know I should be.

Where Am I?

2005-12-16T17:39:00.000-05:00

I have been blocked out of my blog! I can't view my blog when I log on. I can view my blog from others blog links. Why do the blogging gods hate me?

I have to get to the bottom of this. This post is a desparate attempt to cry out for help in hopes that someone, somewhere can hear me...

Am I missing something here?

2005-12-12T14:06:00.000-05:00

Okay, I have not read the Chronicles of Narnia since childhood, and am currently on book 3 of 7. I just read and saw in the news that the story is Christian based. Am I missing something or have the "Christians" once again laid claim to something just to throw Christianity in my face? If the stories are, indeed, Christian based, the message is so subtle it is almost indecipherable. Either that, or I'm stupid (which I pretty confident is not the case). If it were not the intent of Lewis to have this magical fairyland story linked to a religious message, shame on the "Christians". Why do they think they have the right to take over all of the media, society, rights, etc.? Who are they to tell me what I can do, what I can watch, what I can read, what I can listen to, what I can say. Are they God? Last time I checked, no.

Arrrrggggghhhhh.

Judgemental, hypocritical, controlling SOB's!!!

I do not mean any offense to those of you who read this blog and are what I would consider a true Christian: non-judgemental, humble, loving, selfless, understanding ...

The place we now call home

2005-12-11T15:24:00.000-05:00

Well, here it is, our apartment.

The Journey

2005-12-07T17:24:00.000-05:00

After thirty-one years on this earth, I have come to the understanding that my world is more than what I perceive. This may seem like an obvious statement, but I mean more by it than what is on the surface.

I, alone, have the ability to shape my world. I know my desires ... fears ... dreams. I am the only one who can interpret my perceptions and come to a full understanding of how my actions affect things, possibly, beyond my knowledge.

I, alone, have the ability to make a situation good or bad. I have that control.

I, alone, determine the outcome of my life. There will be obstacles along the way. There will be influence from others, but I have the ability to make decisions on how I will interpret the information I am given, and how I will let it alter the course of my life.

I, alone, can make sure my time on earth lives up to its highest potential. As humans, we all have the ability to make choices. Those decisions affect our own lives as well as others. If our own lives are based on simplicity, love, patience, understanding, then our affect on others will be positive.

We all have to exist on this planet. Together. Why do I observe and experience so much discord among the human race? More individuals appear to be working against each other, not with.

In this past year I have experienced, first hand, unconditional love. It was unexpected. It helped me realize how selfish I was actually living. I understand, now, that all it really takes is a selflessness. It is so easy, once you see the world outside of yourself.

So, do I contradict myself?

I don't believe so. Each human has the individual power and strength to do good beyond their comprehension. However, to do that requires a constant retrospection to deep within. One has to be able to know what prohibits them from going outside of the comfort level, and then taking that step.

That is growth.

It is a constant give and take. (A reaching, if you will).

I am ready to start that journey. I know that I can give to the world as much, if not more than I take. I know I don't need all that I have. I know I want more than I need. Those wants cause me stress, sadness, anger and disappointment.

I want to do away with the extraneous negative influences, emotions and desires and concentrate on the good. I know this will be a lifelong journey and today is the first day.

It's so small!

2005-12-01T19:47:00.000-05:00

My first digital camera was delivered today. I am so excited. It is no bigger than my cell phone! It rocks! Of course, they don't mail you a charged battery, so I am currently waiting to play with the camera until my battery recharges .... The great thing about having a digital camera AND a blog is I can now publish pics with my descriptions. Much better to have visuals. This will especially come in handy when we go to Belize.

still charging ....

I like how on the crime scene shows they have all of this technology that allows them to solve crimes with a few clicks of the mouse. It really is amazing. Think of all the crimes that could be solved if we only had tv technology. The sad thing is there are people out there who probably believe this stuff is real. I mean, if they could extract DNA from all of the things tv indicates, all of the crimes in the world should be solved. Plus, these people are geniuses in their crime solving. The way they piece things together. WOW!

still charging ....

yeah! it's done. Now I can start taking pics. See you on the net.

Where did it go?

2005-11-29T09:29:00.000-05:00

It's been eleven days since I last posted, so I thought I should update.

Let's see, what has happened?

Thanksgiving has come and gone. This year has flown by. I think the move really knocked the whole time thing out of whack. We basically have a month and 2005 will be over. I will save my reflections on the year till that time. However, I will comment on Thanksgiving.

It was yet another Burdette Thanksgiving hosted by my dad. It has become a tradition. (Maybe not a Clemson tradition, but close). This year the crowd was a little smaller. One of dad's older brothers had to work and his younger sister went to Florida. Even without all the usual rebel rousers, we had a fun, unique evening. It seems that the past few years my sisters and I have learned more about our family and background. The aunts and uncles have opened up with more stories about their childhood. Maybe we are just getting older and appreciating it more. Either way, it's good to know where you come from and how you got there.

After much eating, a little drinking, and many stories, we all ended up in the sunroom for some pickin' and grinnin' (dad and Turkey Tom were pickin', we were grinnin'). My dad has a knack for getting into the music and really making it his own. We all had a lot of fun watching him. To top the evening off, my youngest sister performed several pieces on the cello. Kudoo's to you, sissypoo.

The next few weeks will be spent with family, working and just trying to get through the year. Then ..... off to Belize!!!!

WOW

2005-11-18T22:22:00.000-05:00

I just had the most amazing two hours.

We went to a Mountain Heart concert at the Imperial Theatre in downtown Augusta. These guys have such energy and talent that I have never experienced. Now, I like bluegrass of all kinds. From the backyard pickin to the "commercial". However, none of those sounds begin to match what I heard tonight. I don't even think I will be able to put it into words. It was inspiring. It was energizing. To see these guys play - and they played fast! - got the toes tapping, the hands clapping and the adrenalin pumping. I love music, but when you hear really good stuff, it is incomparable.

It blows my mind to see musicians not only be able to play notes, but to put life into sound. I cannot fathom the thought process that goes into that. I'm sure some may think it's amazing to be able to design a space from nothing, but to me it's easy. Maybe it's the same for these guys. It's just how they think. I am just glad that they can share that talent with the rest of us poor souls.

I also appreciate that they are a bluegrass band. I haven't done much research into the history of bluegrass, so if anyone has any reading material they can point me to, that would be great. It seems to me that it derives from the Celtic/ Scottish sound. And seeing that those were the primary settlers in the Appalachian mountains, it makes since. But the thing that I have noticed with bluegrass, more than any other type of music, is its ability to bring people from all facets of society together. I saw well coiffed, cashmere clad men and women, ten gallon hats and boots, children, elderly, hippy and suburbanites. And we were all brought together by the love of good, downhome pickin' and grinnin'. You just can't beat that.

Purity.

Ah! Beach Time

2005-11-12T10:02:00.000-05:00

So, I have discovered another plus to moving back to the East Coast ... the beach.

Wednesday through Friday Christian had a conference at St. Simons Island. I had to go with him (per his bosses suggestion). It was tough.

We get down Wednesday, check in and go to the opening reception. After a couple of free drinks we are taken out to dinner at a local crabshack. I had cheese grits and grilled mahi mahi. Yummmmmmmm. The next day Christian has sessions all day, so I head out to the pool which has chairs set up on a boardwalk overlooking the beach. Excellent. It was warm with a light sea breeze blowing in. Not bad for NOVEMBER. That evening we go out to the childhood home of one of Christian's co-workers. It is on the inlet between Jekyll and St. Simons Islands with views of the ocean, marshlands and inner channels. We saw a beautiful sunset. Afterwards, we headed to the Lodge (where the G8 Summit was held a couple of years ago). While at dinner Tom Watson comes in with a group. For those of you who are as ignorant as I am, he has won most of the major golf tournaments (Masters, US and British Open). Pretty impressive. One thing I will say about the experience - the rich don't have anything THAT special. Sure, they probably have less stress when it comes to money issues, but the food, etc isn't better. Although, I could be rich. I think I would be quite good at it. Ha! Ha!

This weekend we are back to reality. Football, movies, house cleaning and grocery shopping. There is something to be said for a simple life.

What's going on

2005-11-02T18:30:00.000-05:00

A simple act of defiance by one person changed the country.

That is quite an accomplishment. Don't we all want to be that person that goes down in history as having made a difference? The tricky part is, you can never know which act will be the noble one. We can't go through life trying to make a difference to change history. We have to try to make a difference to make not our lives, but our children's lives, our grandchildren's lives, better. I don't think those who are truly great set out trying to be great. Those who are great are humble. They are giving. They are serving. They are stewards.

Since moving to Augusta and becoming a minority in the city, I have had a lot of opportunity to view African American men and women in leadership positions. There is a pride that they carry. A strength. A knowledge that they have had a lot to overcome in history, and in some areas still have a long way to go.

It amazes me, coming back to the South, how far behind we are. How archaic many attitudes are. We have great people in this country, of all colors and nationalities. Instead of focusing on race, it is time that we focused on greatness. We need to teach our children not only about the great people in history, but those traits that make those few people great. I believe they are the same traits that promote strong communities and strong families. They are traits that are disappearing to mega this and mega that society.

If you have them - hold on to them for yourself and pass them on for your future.

The Vacation is Over

2005-10-29T09:05:00.000-05:00

Well, that week went by quickly.

It is hard to believe that two weeks ago we were still in Springfield. I am glad we decided to take an extra week off before starting work. We haven't actually done anything, but it is good to take a break. I imagine that we will both be swamped come next week. We both seem to put extra pressure on ourselves to do well, especially when we are starting something new. I am anxious to see what type of project I will be working on.

Thursday night Christian had to attend the CSRA (Central Savannah River Area) RDC (Regional Development Center) annual business meeting. Being the "wife" I had to attend, too. It was a good opportunity to meet many of Christian's co-workers. Everyone seems very nice. We already got a couple of dinner invitations. The historic preservationist (who had given me the list of architects to send my info to) came up and whisked me away. She took me to the outside of the building we were meeting in to show me the plaque that said my office designed the building. It was the pavillion at the headwaters of the Savannah river. She then explained some of the history of the canal, various outbuildings that had recently be renovated, and to tell me some of the local museums that we had to check out.

Last night we went out with our across the hall neighbors. Last week, Christain had meet the guy and he said they would get together with us this week and go grab some dinner. I was overwhelmed at the hospitality. I mean, I would expect a "welcome to the neighborhood/ city", but not "let's go get dinner", too. Well, they had left a note on our door inviting us to dinner Thursday. Obviously, that wasn't good for us, so we made plans for Friday. They drove us around to some of the nearby trailheads, and then we went for pizza and beer. They seem like a really nice couple. We also seem to have very similar ideals. That is good, because it seems our "liberal" opinions are the minority. She is from rural West Virginia and he is from New York. He is a medical student and she is getting a degree in Public Admin./ Public Health. Very interesting.

So, here we are, settled in. Potentially with new friends and close to family. Even with all of this, I am very much looking forward to January. We get to go to Belize for 8 days, but more importantly, we get to see a couple of our friends from Springfield. Even with Thanksgiving and Christmas coming up, that is the highlight of our future plans.

Well, today we will be watching Clemson (go Tigers) vs. GA Tech . Later this evening we may go to a local coffee house and check out a Bluegrass band. Tomorrow we will probably take the bikes out on one of the trails. Busy. Busy.

Looks Like We Made It

2005-10-24T08:56:00.000-05:00

If the title of this blog has gotten that song stuck in your head ... you're welcome.

We are officially residents of Georgia. Well, I guess that is not entirely true. I guess that we will become "official" when we get our drivers license updated and register to vote. But, nonetheless, we are moved in and mostly unpacked. There is even some food in the fridge.

Last week was one big blur. Last weekend we said our final goodbyes to our closest friends. It wasn't as sad as I would have imagined. I guess because we fail to believe that it was really "goodbye". We will see everyone again, and that makes it easier. Monday, the movers showed up around 8:30. By 11:30 our house was empty. I kept busy cleaning, so I didn't allow myself any sadness over leaving our first home. Monday night we went out with our neighbor for sushi. Yum, yum. We spent a few hours hanging out with them, then went to our empty house, blew up the air mattress and tried to get a few hours of sleep before waking before the roosters.

Tuesday we got up, finished packing the car (and the cats) and were on the road by 5:30 am. The cats were fun. Our vet, Ted Hammacker, gave me some tranquilizers in case we needed them. I decided the cats typically did okay in the car, so I was going to try the trip sans-tranquilizers. Well, they did not want to get in the small cat carrier, let alone together. After a number of chases around the house, and a few scratches on the hand, I finally got both cats in the carrier. Mocha was not happy and kept hissing at Pickens. Well, we got the carrier situated in the car and closed up the house. When we backed out of the drive, it hit me. We were leaving. That house is not our home anymore. A few tears were shed, but I was able to compose myself before we were out of Springfield.

I napped for a couple of hours and when I woke up, we stopped for a cup of Joe and a Crossanwich. Burger King has some addictive advertising. The remainder of the trip was pretty uneventful. We did stop for lunch and put food, water and litter out for the cats. I think they were pretty traumatized, because they did not even get out of the cage.

We pulled into my dad's house in Walhalla, SC around 8:30 that night.

The next morning we once again left the house at 5:30 in the morning to make it to Augusta by 8:00. The movers actually beat us to our apartment. By noon, all of our stuff was in our apartment. We went and bought a washer and dryer (my first) and headed back to SC with a load of stuff that would not fit into the apartment. Thursday we headed back to Augusta and started unpacking. Did I just pack all of this stuff? Why didn't we just leave it and start over when we got here?

Thursday and Friday we were able to get most everything unpacked and arranged. Friday the cable guy came and set up our cable and internet. It was so nice to finally be connected! Saturday we headed back to SC with another load of stuff. We also were able to attend the 1st birthday party of the son of my best friend from high school, and have dinner with them afterwards. It was good to finally see a friendly face.

Sunday it was back to Augusta. Hopefully, we won't be doing any major driving for a few weeks. Wednesday my dad and youngest sister are stopping by for dinner on their way from Florida to SC.

All in all, I think this is going to be good. Adjusting to apartment life is going to be interesting, but we know it is temporary. It will be good to start work next week and get back into a regular schedule. I certainly miss the comfort zone of Springfield and all of our friends there, but I feel like I am home. I just wish I could bring everyone out here.

Packing Sucks

2005-10-12T16:18:00.000-05:00

Step by Step

2005-10-06T12:41:00.000-05:00

We have eleven days and a few hours left in this town.

Our guest room is piled with stuff we will sell Saturday.

We met with a real estate agent today.

It is all becoming very real. However, I am not finding myself sad or depressed.

We have spent six great years in this community. We have felt a lot of pain and pride. We have encountered people that have helped us grow (from both very positive influence and very, very negative influence). We bought our first house here. We have been involved with countless architectural, planning and community changes. Some were fought for tooth and nail, some came very easily. We can look back at our time in Springfield and know that we did something. Maybe not much, but we had a part in making the city and our community a better place. We are blessed.

But now we must go, and I am not sad. I am looking forward to the next city and the next set of opportunities. We have experience now. We can use our recently gained knowledge to better another neighborhood. We will be closer to family. We will get to attend birthday parties and performances. We can help my dad start a garden again. We have so much life to live that it is hard to be sad.

Yes, we will be leaving a lot of great people. People that will never be replaced. Some we will see again, some we will not. But all will be remembered.

This city and those who have crossed our paths have helped to shape us. It seems that we have both changed more here than any other time and place in our lives. Maybe it's maturity. Whatever it is, Springfield is a part of us. The memory and experiences will be forever etched in our minds and our hearts. We will tell our children about our adventures here, about the people, about the places. Eventually, some of our ashes will return for a final resting place.

But I am not sad. I am happy to have had the experience. It was our "Big Adventure".

2005-10-03T16:43:00.000-05:00

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Yeah, I'm That Good

2005-09-26T12:20:00.000-05:00

So, we have been introduced to the joys of open houses. We put the "For Sale by Owner" sign in our yard last Sunday. Since then, about 50 flyers have been picked up. We had an open house that afternoon. Paired with the open house next door, we got free advertising and a lot of people streaming through. This Sunday we had about a dozen people come through. There was one couple that seemed very interested. We got good vibes from them, so we'll see what happens. The thing that I can say about hosting an open house is they are very boring. You basically sit for a couple of hours and try to be friendly, but not too interested in the people coming through your home. I have gotten a lot of compliments on my decor.

I sent out my portfolio and resume to five firms in Augusta last Tuesday. I was going to do follow up calls this afternoon and tomorrow to try to set up interviews at the end of this week (since we will be down looking for a place to live). Well, I have already received two emails from two of the firms saying they were very impressed with my work and would like to set up interviews. Awesome!! *toot toot* (that's me tooting my own horn, not passing gas like some sisters I know ...)

Only three weeks left in Springfield. It get tough when we think about all that we are leaving behind, but it is very exciting to think of all that will be waiting in the southeast. I have to say that a big part of me just wants this part to be over and to get on with the new chapter in our life. I never have been one to get too sentimental, so impatience is starting to kick in. It will be a lot more fun when we have signed a lease and know what we are moving into. Hopefully a loft!

Homeward Bound

2005-09-15T17:09:00.000-05:00

Well, the time has come for Christian and I to make my family VEEERRRRYYY happy. We are moving back to the south!

Last week Christian accepted a job in Augusta, Georgia. After a lot of discussion and thought, I might add. We have developed many strong friendships and working relationships in the past six years. All of which are very hard to leave. However, after putting the emotional aspect and just looking at the job, it was clear that this was the right step to take. Christian will be advancing in his career, and we will be much closer to both of our families.

Last weekend we told all of our close friends. It was very hard. The children didn't understand and cried. I have never made a child cry before. Needless to say, I joined in the crying. The hardest part was knowing that our joy is causing others sadness. That hurts.

We have four weeks left in this town and we are going to make sure we spend as much time as we can with the people who have made this city feel like home. I have a feeling that starting tomorrow we will be on a whirlwind ride to Augusta.

Erie

2005-09-14T17:14:00.000-05:00

You Are Likely a First Born

At your darkest moments, you feel guilty.
At work and school, you do best when you're researching.
When you love someone, you tend to agree with them often.

In friendship, you are considerate and compromising.
Your ideal careers are: business, research, counseling, promotion, and speaking.
You will leave your mark on the world with discoveries, new information, and teaching people to dream.

The Birth Order Predictor

2005-09-12T15:30:00.000-05:00

You are an Atheist

When it comes to religion, you're a non-believer (simple as that).
You prefer to think about what's known and proven.
You don't need religion to solve life's problems.
Instead, you tend to work things out with logic and philosophy.

What's Your Religious Philosophy?

Productive Weekend

2005-09-06T11:53:00.000-05:00

This weekend turned out to be a lot more productive than we had planned. We had initially talked about going to Memphis for the weekend to celebrate our 7th anniversary. Due to Christian's pulled hamstring and the events that unfolded this past week, we decided it wasn't the right time.

Friday was a tough day for me. I don't think I was at all productive at work. My mind kept wandering back to the Hurricane victims. I found a few places to register our house to be a host house for the displaced.

Friday afternoon we called some friends to see if they wanted to go have dinner with us. They said they were in the middle of painting their house and probably wouldn't be able to. Christian and I made dinner and decided we should go help them. They had helped us with our porch, and we need to do something. Otherwise, we would have watched the news all evening and gotten severely depressed. Saturday, Sunday and Monday, we put in several hours painting. It was actually a lot of fun, and even though we weren't able to do anything to help the Hurricane victims, at least we were able to help someone. It made us feel much better, and we put them WAY ahead of schedule.

Saturday I bought some fabric to make throw pillows for the living room. I cleaned the house, did laundry and got groceries. Sunday night we went to dinner for our anniversary (since everything was closed Monday). It was a very good dinner.

I find it interesting that a few months ago, I would have felt we were imposing or if our friends needed/ wanted our help, they would ask. Now I am more than willing to offer a helping hand. Even if it is just picking up something from the grocery store. I would like to chalk it up to another level of maturation. Becoming more aware of what is going on and needed around me and giving up my extra time to help others. Giving really does feel good, and we couldn't have had a better anniversary.

2005-09-02T08:31:00.000-05:00

The devastation is unreal.

I watch television each night and I should be viewing footage of a third world country. But, I'm not. It's America. The land of the free and the home of the brave.

I don't see any free or brave. I see desperate people. I see pain, I see death. I cry.

We are too good for this kind of suffering. That is the thought that goes through my head. But, we're not. We are no different than any other country that goes through suffering and destruction.

But wait, we are different. There are people like me in America. People who are able - both financially and physically - to help. I can send relief to these people. The elderly, the children. I have more than enough to take care of my family and help those who need it so much more than me.

I want to go down there and gather up a car full of people. I want to bring them back to my house and feed them, clothe them, let them know that they will be okay. They can go on. They are cared for. But, I'm told I shouldn't. We need money the organizations say. That's not enough for me. It's easy to give money and feel that I've made a difference.

Not this time. I don't want to help from afar. I don't want to be one of the well-off feeling satisfied with myself that I sent a check to help. This time, that won't be enough. I want to give of myself. In anyway I can. I don't want to sit in my living room watching the poor souls who are abandoned in the destroyed cities and cry.

I want to get out there and bring them love.

2005-08-29T09:22:00.000-05:00

I too have been spamed. So, on with the increased securtiy.

It's an Asian kind of Day

2005-08-26T15:23:00.000-05:00

I don't know what an Asian kind of day would actually be like, but at least in the food department I am going all Asian today. Sweet and Sour Chicken for lunch, sushi for dinner. I don't know why I even bother with the Chinese food. I really don't enjoy it that much. Oh well, at least I get good fortunes. Today's was "Your life will be happy and peaceful". Nice.

Not much going on today. Work is so-so. We have a set of drawings that need to get sent to the owner's rep. today or Monday. The way it is going, it looks like it will be Monday. The plotter is sooooo sllloooowwww. Plus, I discovered that you can only send so many drawings to the plotter before it gives you error messages. I guess 60 is the limit.

This weekend looks to be pretty relaxing. I will spend most of tomorrow studying, actually "practicing" for my last graphics test on Monday. After this, I have three more exams and I will be a registered architect. I sure hope I get through them with no problems. I plan on finishing them up by the end of the year. It hasn't helped that I have taken a summer hiatus. Oh well, back to the grind.

I've been thinking about the whole religion thing. I think I have peaked my family's interest by some of my recent comments on various blogs. I have to say that I am not actively pursuing an understanding. I do get moments of thoughts or inquiry, but I am not trying to find an answer. However, it is interesting when you look at the basis of all religions (that I have looked into). They are basically the same. No matter what rituals, holidays or holy days that go with the teachings, the basic message is love. I guess when I see that, I wonder why it matters what denomination you belong to (or if you even belong to any denomination). If you can seek to achieve love in your life without being Christian or Buddhist or Islam or whatever, why are you judged when you reveal that you are not "religious". I am amazed at how people instantly judge if they find out you don't go to church, or worse yet, you don't "believe" in God. It's like you suddenly become alien and they don't know how to deal with you.

It is very interesting to come to the realization of things in life. I am not sure that I like this "adult" thing.

Why are we here?

2005-08-23T13:33:00.000-05:00

Religion.

This is a word that can bring many connotations, depending on where and how you were raised.

Religion is defined as:
Belief in and reverence for a supernatural power or powers regarded as creator and governor of the universe.
A personal or institutionalized system grounded in such belief and worship.
The life or condition of a person in a religious order.
A set of beliefs, values, and practices based on the teachings of a spiritual leader.
A cause, principle, or activity pursued with zeal or conscientious devotion

Why, then, has religion been caught up in the mega and the political. Where has religion gone?

I grew up in a strict but fair religion. I was taught that a relationship between an individual and God is personal. You are called by God to be a member of his family. The main message I remember from the bible is Love. However, I look at the world now and have to wonder if anyone truly reads the bible? I personally do not. I do not know if I believe in God and the directions given in the bible specifically. I do believe there is a power higher than us. The earth should be revered and respected. You can see the power contained in the earth by watching it renew itself with floods, fires, hurricanes, etc. Because of my beliefs, or non-beliefs, one may think I am in no position to have an opinion on the religious. Maybe I don't. But I can't help observe hypocrisies.

I find it ironic all the people who are so offended by not being able to pray in school, not being able to display the ten commandments in government buildings, not being able to throw their religion in everyone else's face. When did religion become a benchmark of how "good" of a person you are? When did it become anyone's business how you worship, where you worship, what you worship or if you worship? Why do people feel it necessary to flaunt their holiness in public. Are they better because they pray out loud, in public, before eating lunch or dinner? Are they more spiritual because they are American? Where is the tolerance, the love, the private, personal relationship with God that is preached in the book that is supposedly the cornerstone of Christianity?

This is a main reason I am not religious. If I feel closer to the power greater than us, it is not in a building and certainly not in a mega church. I feel closer when I am in nature, surrounded by the awe and beauty that is greater than me. I feel closer when I am being trusted with the deepest secrets and dreams of a friend. I feel closer when I am reading a great book or listening to beautiful music or looking at a magnificent work of art or architecture. When I see something that is greater than myself, but that touches me on a deep level. I feel closer when I am forced to examine myself and discover a flaw and a path to fixing it. These are things that are personal. These are things that I will not flaunt in public. These are things that I must experience alone.

I strongly believe that we were made to question, to constantly seek the answers to the unknown. That all of this searching will ultimately help us become better humans. But, we must put others ahead of ourselves. It will be of no use if we become better for self gain. We must love our fellow man and the environment that we live in. This is the one word that sums up the whole reason I believe we are on this earth. We must learn to love, unconditionally. Once we achieve that level of selflessness, we will be complete.

Love is: A deep, tender, ineffable feeling of affection and solicitude toward a person, such as that arising from kinship, recognition of attractive qualities, or a sense of underlying oneness.

Introspective

2005-08-19T15:15:00.000-05:00

The past couple of days have been extremely thought provoking.

With the gas prices hitting home and the fate of our neighborhood school in question, I have thought a lot about community and values.

As a society, we are loosing them.

I have touched on how I feel about the energy sources and the importance of pushing for renewable energy, so I won't go into that any more. Other than saying that we can all send a message to our government by the choices we make. We as consumers are going to have to start demanding environmentally conscious materials before they will be offered.

Community.

Below is a letter that I wrote to the local newspaper concerning the potential closing of our neighborhood schools:

"The August 18th article: “Spare Rountree, School District Panel Suggests” shows the R-12 Long Range Planning Committee does not truly understand the needs of center-city neighborhoods. The committee has backed down from its original recommendation of closing the schools in order to avoid controversy. This does not address the need to maintain and improve center-city schools. It appears that the committee has not considered that many of us who live in center-city have chosen to lead a smart growth lifestyle by living close to work and school. The sprawl-promoting mega-schools are not conducive to the lifestyle choices we have made and want to instill in our children.

The small neighborhood schools do more than provide children a place to receive an education. These schools are the heart of the neighborhoods. They are often what keep the neighborhoods going, and they provide a sense of community. Saving the small schools is not about saving a building or nostalgia. It is about saving our communities. It is about teaching our children that there are more important aspects of life than how much money you make or how big your car and house are. It is about teaching our children to be good neighbors, to respect others, to give.

Closing the neighborhood schools does not enforce these values. It is setting the example that it is acceptable to turn your back on your community for a profit. We have to invest in those things that help enhance our society. Investing in center-city and in the schools in these neighborhoods will enhance our society. These are the areas that maintain our sense of place and define our community, and they are worth maintaining and improving."

With suburban sprawl, the super vehicle, supersize this and supersize that society has lost connectiveness. Whether it is connectiveness with the environment, other humans, the community, it seems to have fallen by the waistside. We have to hang on to those things that keep us connected. Our downtowns, our urban neighborhoods, those area the places that can keep us grounded. Cheaper is not better. Bigger is not better. Some things cannot have a price placed on them.

My neighborhood is a throw back to the 1940's. It is very Norman Rockwellesque. you walk down any street and there are people walking or sitting on their front porch. You wave, say hi, stop and have conversations. You help your neighbors without them requesting it. You have fun. You do not drive miles to get to your home, pull in the garage and shut yourself off from your neighbors. We connect. We know the history of our neighborhood, our city, our neighbors and we are proud to have that knowledge.

We are able to influence the children in our neighborhood. They are able to look to the adults and see them helping others, helping the community, standing up for what we believe is important. They are growing up understanding compassion. How is that going to be taught in the mega school where the child is displaced from the neighborhood he or she lives? Where that child becomes another test score that has to be raised? What happened to educating a child on life? Do they even have good citizenship awards anymore?

These are issues that are bigger than me, bigger than my neighborhood, but they are issues that I believe in.

Yessssssss

2005-08-17T12:04:00.000-05:00

I just had the greatest news on earth! Aaron Ruell and Jon Heder will be in Joplin at 7 pm next Friday!!!! That is only about an hour away!!!! I have got to find someone to go with me. That will be awesome.

Another fun tidbit of information. It cost us $30 to fill up our 11.4 gallon fuel tank in our car. I hate to know how much it costs the suv driving surburbanites. muuuaaaahhhahhhahaha. And this is another reason to live close to work, etc. I hope this is what it takes for people to wake up and realize we have to start using alternative energy sources. Let me ammend that - alternative renewable energy sources. It won't do us a bit of good if we keep using up the earths resources. It is very ironic that Bush is so ultra christian. However, if he is such a good christian, why isn't he being a steward of the earth? Shouldn't he (and others like him) be on the forefront of protecting the earth instead of destroying it? Curious. At least I know that I am doing a lot to help the situation. I try to be conscious of the products I buy and how they affect the earth. I, by no means, am perfect, but at least I'm trying.

Okay, off the soap box.

2005-08-15T12:21:00.000-05:00

This weekend was pretty laid back and restful. Although, I still ended up waking up this morning exhausted. Is there something about Monday mornings?

Saturday I woke up at 6:30 and finished the 6th Harry Potter book. Pretty good. Big surprise at the end. Can't wait for the last one to tie everything together.

After that, I had coffee, showered, watched some tv. When Christian got back from the gym, we went to do some shopping. I got a pair of plaid pants and a brown cord jacket. I met Christian at Borders where I picked up the last Patricia Cornwell book that I haven't read and "Bastard Out of Carolina". Wasn't that a movie a few years back? All I know is it is set in Greenville County, so it must be good. Christian got the latest Dave Matthews Band CD and a Chemical Brothers CD. That night we went over to the Burns for dinner. We ended the evening with an hour long hand of UNO. They play with some crazy rules. I didn't play because I had the baby the entire night.

Sunday, we got up, had coffee, delivered a couple of streets worth of neighborhood block party flyers and went to the Burns (again) for breakfast. Yummmy! Waffles, eggs, bacon, fruit. I was done with eating for the rest of the day. We came back home around noon. Christian went to the gym and I proceeded to take a 1 1/2 hour nap. Nice. I did some laundry and read/ watched tv the remainder of the day. It was really nice.

Work is kind of boring lately. I am in between a few projects, so there is very little that has to be done right now. Hopefully that will pick up soon. It's tough to stay motivated. Maybe I'll clean my space.

Little Known Fact

2005-08-10T16:26:00.000-05:00

Cat's can have allergies.

Isn't that hilarious?

2005-08-10T13:59:00.000-05:00

I started this blog writing about my thoughts on solar energy, suburban sprawl and humanities choices. That got me really frustrated, so I erased it.

The longer I practice architecture, the further I get from reasons I enjoy architecture. So, in this blog, I am going to brainstorm on those reasons in hopes of regaining my inspiration. I am going to try to refrain from comparing what I enjoy to what I actually do. That would just be depressing. I think this will be a manifesto of sorts.

Here goes.

Architecture shapes our environment, both sensory and physical. The role of architecture should be to provide a physical enclosure that protects, inspires, comforts. This can be accomplished through materials, spatiality, site, views.

As an architect I should create spaces that inspire.

I should create spaces that respect and enhance the environment surrounding them.

I should create spaces from materials that do not deplete the earth.

Architecture is of this earth and should, therefore respect it in every way. Giving back when possible.

I should create spaces that allow for discovery both internally and externally.

Architecture should be a form of beauty from the way it sits on a site, to the overall appearance, down to the way the column meets the beam. It should always invoke further exploration and understanding.

2005-08-09T13:05:00.000-05:00

Your Summer Ride is a Beetle Convertible

Fun, funky, and a little bit euro.
You love your summers to be full of style and sun!

What's Your Summer Ride?

2005-08-04T15:30:00.000-05:00

It is hard to believe that the year is 3/4 over. Where does the time go. Aging sucks.

Nothing much has gone on the past few days. Sunday evening we delivered a present to our friends who just had a baby. He was three weeks early, so he is on the small side, but oh so cute!!! Luckily they only live a block away and said I could come over to hold him any time. HeHeHe!! Monday we went to dinner at another couple who are moving to California. We had some excellent food and conversation. Hopefully they will do well.

This week we went to lift weights on Tuesday, and watched TV last night. Very exciting, I know. We are having friends over for dinner Saturday night. Two of the couples have new borns, so that should be fun. Now all of our friends have babies. It's crazy.

Pickens (our black cat) got sick this week. He puked in every room of our house Monday. We ignored it until the next morning. Who wants to clean up cat puke in the middle of the night? He has been quarantined and on a special diet for the last couple of days. Last night, I put his food in our room but left the door open. In walks our other cat and proceeds to eat ALL of his food. She ate more in one sitting than he did all day. What a piggy. Lucky for her she's cute.

We are finally getting some rain. I doubt it will make up our 6" deficit, but hopefully it will help.

One month from tomorrow is our seven year anniversary. Wow! That's pretty good. I guess we need to start figuring out if we are going out of town, or just doing something low key. I kind of want a piece of furniture instead of a trip. :)

Well, back to work.

Some people are like Slinkies...

2005-07-29T17:17:00.000-05:00

Not really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.

That cracks me up.

Nothing much going on in the world today (the world of Heather, that is. I am sure a lot is going on in the world in general). Anyhoo, the work was minimal today. Yesterday was a deadline, so most of us just cleaned up our spaces to prepare for the next onslaught of work. I spent some time searching for a new hair cut. No luck. Hopefully I will come up with something by tomorrow evening when I go to get it cut.

This weekend looks to be pretty low key. Christian pulled his hamstring, so he won't be exercising. That is actually good for me (if I can deal with his moodiness) because now I can get him to help me clean the house. No excuses this week. Muuaaahahahaha!!!!

We watched Hitch last week. Pretty enjoyable. We have Spongebob Square Pants, National Treasure and In Good Company to watch. I think we'll go have sushi for dinner tomorrow night - it's been a while.

Oh, since I never include pictures, I have inserted picture of me and my new nephew Ben (on Christian's side).

We have standards for a reason, people!

2005-07-27T12:47:00.000-05:00

In the office, I have been assigned as "CAD Standards Chic". Which basically means I set up the office standards for layer, colors, lineweights, etc. in which we draft on AutoCAD. Great. Problem is this office doesn't know how to operate with standards ... of any sort. So, what's the point. It usually turns into a situation of "This is on the wrong layer (color, block, linetype ...), you're the CAD standards girl, fix it." Let's not even think about the fact that I DIDN'T DRAW IT!!!! It's hard to fly with eagles when you have to deal with turkeys! Okay, enough complaining.

Well, a cold front has finally come through Springfield. After three digit temperatures, the 80's feel very comfortable. Of course, I don't think it is going to last, but I'll enjoy the next few days.

Nothing really exciting has happened this week, or will happen this weekend. Oh, I did loose one of my favorite earrings! It really suck because I got them in Canada and I don't think I will be able to replace them. Time to search the internet.

Good Vibrations

2005-07-21T12:13:00.000-05:00

So, I am starting to price vacations. We can go to Aruba for 8 days in December for about $2,000, per person. This includeds airfare from Springfield. I'm thinking that is a pretty good price, but I need to see if there are cheaper islands, cheaper resorts, etc. All in all, I am pretty sure that we will be spending a week on a tropical island in December. I cannot wait. We have never been on a tropical vacation. I want to be able to walk out of my door and directly onto the beach. Mimosa's served to me at 9 and Pina Colada's at noon. Ahhhhhh!

So, tomorrow the temperature is going to be over 100. I should get up and run in the morning, but that would require me to get up before 6. Hmmmmm, possible heat stroke or 30 minutes sleep? That is actually a tough one. I'll only be running for about 15 minutes, so that won't kill me. I'll opt for more sleep. I just have to make sure to drink A LOT of water, and some gatorade to keep the salt in me longer.

Well, I'm getting hungry, so I think I will go warm up the Lean Cuisine swedish meatballs I brought for lunch. Not that great, but I didn't have time to fix lunch this morning. I think I'll make spaghetti tonight. With Texas Toast and salad with blue cheese dressing. Yuuummmm.

Nap Time

2005-07-20T12:53:00.000-05:00

Well, after about 4 weeks of laziness, I am back to exercising. I have lifted two days, and this is the first day I got back out and ran. Of course, I have to pick the hottest day of the year in Springfield to start running again. Despite the heat, I ran 1.5 miles. Not extraordinary, but it's a good start. So, now I'm tired. I guess a Coke is in order for the afternoon.

Big George Rocks!

2005-07-18T17:16:00.000-05:00

If you are into cycling, you know that Sunday's stage was big for Greenville, SC native George Hancapie. His first ever Tour stage win. Go George!!!!

Other than that, this weekend was pretty low key. Friday night we met some friends for drinks and appetizers at a downtown eatery. We then walked up the street to a new arcade. 1984. It has all of the old 80's arcade games. You pay $5 and can play as much as you want, and no one under 18 is allowed without an adult. I guess it is cool if you are into those things. I wasn't allowed to play video games. My only video game system was educational. How sad is that. However, I am now the office speller, so I guess some good came out of it.

Saturday we watched the tour. Afterwards I cleaned the house and Christian went on a two hour bike ride. We then walked up to Imo's (best thin pizza) and had lunch, walked across the street and bought a couple of sarongs to hang in our living room and bedroom, and then walked to a friends house to check out his remodeling. I am going to work up some drawings, and he is going to help us rewire our house. After that, we drove down to our house so he and his friend could check out our house. Then, as we were sitting there, they started talking about dinner. So, we ended up going out for sushi with them. The cool thing is, they are actually friends of friends that we have met only a few times at parties. We had a lot of fun with them. After we got back, our neighbor came home from a wedding. I mixed up a couple of Gin and Gingers and we sat on the front porch talking for hours. It was midnight by the time I went in to bed. Excellent conversation. It is great to be able to have people you can just talk to.

Sunday, we watched the tour. Christian went to work out and I laid around watching tv and working on laundry. When he got back, we grabbed a bite to eat and went grocery shopping. After that we went to Pier 1 to shop for baskets. I hate shopping with Christian. I like to go, browse, and comparison shop. He does not allow for that. Frustrating. We then went to Home Depot to get drawer pulls for the dresser I painted a few weeks ago. Nothing. After that, we picked up our friend Dan and went to Fuddruckers. Yummmmy burger!

Last night there was no tour (rest day), so we watched Hotel Rowanda. That is an EXCELLENT movie. Very moving. Tonight: weights and the Tour.

It also looks like a guy in our office is going to start running. That is good, becuase I need someone to run with for motivation. Of course, he is over 6'-0", so I will be running a lot faster in order to keep up. Oh well, I can do it. The plan? Running in the Springfield Turkey Trot with my sisters on Thanksgiving Day. Start running girls!

2005-07-15T17:09:00.000-05:00

You Are 34% American

America: You don't love it or want to leave it.
But you wouldn't mind giving it an extreme make over.
On the 4th of July, you'll fly a freak flag instead...
And give Uncle Sam a sucker punch!

How American Are You?

2005-07-15T17:03:00.000-05:00

You Are 33 Years Old

33

Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe.

13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.

20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.

30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!

40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

And I'm only 31.

2005-07-15T17:00:00.000-05:00

Your Birthdate: March 9

Your birth on the 9th day of the month adds a tone of idealism and humanitarianism to your nature.

You become one who can work easily with people because you are broadminded, tolerant and generous.

You are ever sensitive to others' needs and feelings, and you are very sympathetic and compassionate.

Your feeling run deep and you often find yourself in dramatically charged situations.

This 9 energy always tends to give more that it gets.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

2005-07-15T16:59:00.001-05:00

In a Past Life...

You Were: A Blind Beekeeper.

Where You Lived: Boliva.

How You Died: In Childbirth.

Who Were You In a Past Life?

2005-07-15T16:59:00.000-05:00

Your Blogging Type Is the Private Performer

Your blog is your stage - with your visitors your adoring fans.
At least, that's how you write with your witty one liners.
And while you like attention, you value your privacy.
You're likely to have an anonymous blog - or turn off comments.

What's Your Blogging Personality?